The Slender Reed

Closure

2008-09-02T14:34:00.002-06:00

Today is my 35th birthday. That's pretty old. And while it's not necessarily too old to blog, my life is certainly too boring to write about. A cute kid story here, praise for a TV show there. That's all I've given here for what seems like years. It really is time to wrap it up and let you, the few loyal readers, know that there will be no more posts.

I'm terminally uninspired, plus I'm looking for a new job that keeps me busy and hopefully pays a lot. If I get one of those, I'd have to stop anyway, so it might as well be now. I'm going to keep it up if you want to peruse my archives for a particularly funny post or cute kid picture.

You'll still see me reading your blogs and leaving comments. Plus, I think everyone who reads this is already my friend on Facebook. If you're not, then get on Facebook and become my friend. Email me at "CharlieBravoKilo2000 (at) excite dawt com" and I'll give you my name so you can find me there. I trust you can figure out the "code" to the address.

Cheers and thanks for the virtual friendship.

That's my boy!

2008-08-13T14:07:00.004-06:00

Well, we're back from vacation (a couple weeks ago, but I'm lazy). We had a really good, relaxing time. Didn't do too much except hang out at the beach/pool, get sunburned on day 1 (just like every time) and watch the boys play in the water. We went to one of the Golden Isles in southern Georgia. It was a really neat place, with very picturesque oak trees that had Spanish Moss hanging from them, and palm trees, too. I got to play golf badly two days as an added bonus, and also sweat my ass off in the stifling humidity. I actually ran twice, 5.5 miles each time, so that countered some of the excessive eating I was doing. All in all, a good vacation. Just not much to tell about it.

Now back home I'm still struggling to get into my regular exercise routine. We were all exhausted after we came back, partially due to the time difference (that's our favorite excuse, anyway). Yesterday I researched diet pills to try and jump start some weight/ fat loss that seems to have stalled. I need to just exercise more regularly, but it's not always easy on a family schedule. The fall isn't going to get any easier when my wife is in school. I probably won't do the pills, though. Even though they do work for some people, they're pretty expensive without a guarantee that they'll work on me. Plus, I don't want anything to make me slack off my running. If I'm going to meet my goals, I need to be diligent and consistent.

That's about it for happenings around here. I'm enjoying the Olympics, like I always do, and letting all the problems with China and their government slip my mind in the process.

As for the post's title, that refers to my almost three year old son. He's getting so big and saying new words and phrases all the time. It's so cute. A little while ago he came up to me and said "Mommie's nipples is big!" He said it to my wife while she was toplessly getting him dressed, and she told him to tell me. I was so proud.

Sun and Sand Bound

2008-07-23T13:25:00.002-06:00

Well, I'm off for a beach vacation soon, so I thought I'd let you know why I won't be posting for a little while. This time it's a legitimate excuse, and not just laziness.

I also thought I'd tell you about some of the things I mentioned in my last post:

- The Police/ Elvis Costello concert was a-MAZE-ing! Sure, there are songs I would have liked to hear from both acts that they didn't play, and Elvis's set was only 45 minutes, but what an opportunity! And neither act disappointed. They played tight, sounded great. The Police are more of a jam band live than I would have thought. And Elvis can wail on lead guitar. Who knew? Very awesome concert.

- Ran 9 miles at an 8:50 per mile pace, which is better than what I ran 8.5 at last week. That's good.

- Watched some of the last Avatar eps (and they're great) but I promised my son I'd wait for him to catch up on the ones I watched before we watch the last ones together. Now we're leaving on vacation and won't get to see them until we come back. Damn!

- My car, in fact, got below 20 mpg on its third and fourth tanks. The fourth tank was the lowest yet. Motherfucker!

Now some stuff I didn't mention in the last post:

- Saw The Dark Knight and it fucking ruled! Best superhero movie I've ever seen. One of the best movies I've seen in a while. Heath Ledger will scare the shit out of you and make you laugh at the same time.

- Saw Derek Trucks and Susan Tedeschi in concert last night. It was good, not really my favorite kind of music, but Derek is something else on guitar. Incredible slide player.

Hasta la bosta, everyone!

Things to be happy about

2008-07-14T09:50:00.002-06:00

1. I'm going on a beach vacation in a little over a week.
2. I'm going to see The Police and Elvis Costello in less than a week.
3. Today is Tanya Donelly's 42nd birthday. Happy birthday, Tanya!
4. I took my guitar out last night and put it in a place where I might actually play it more than once a year.
5. My wife found my stopwatch.
6. I ran 8.5 miles last night and because I had my stopwatch I could determine I ran just under a 9 minute mile pace. Not blazing speed, but I'll take it for now.
7. New episodes of Avatar start again today!!! Woot!
8. I like my new car and it got just over 20 mpg on its second tank. Hopefully it will start getting even better.
9. I wrote another post after almost a month.
10. My life is going smoothly enough to not warrant writing much on my blog.
11. Videos!

One of my favorite Police songs:

In honor of Miss Donelly's birthday something from her solo repertoire, The Bright Light:

And a classic Belly performance of "Gepetto" from MTV's old John Stewart Show. I totally remember seeing this back in the day:

Because it rocks

2008-06-13T15:02:00.001-06:00

And because more people need to love this band.

"A Distant History" by Idlewild

This is anything

2008-06-12T10:00:00.002-06:00

Someone asked me yesterday to blog something... anything. So this is my anything. Things are going well with me, pretty smoothly. I guess that's why I haven't been posting. Things are just going. My older son finished his lacrosse season, and did really well. He's liking the sport, which is great, since I'm really liking it, too. At the end of the season we had a party and played a game between parents and coaches. I got to play in it and it was a blast.

As for my running, that's going well. I've decided to try for my 22:39 5K in the Fall, probably at my son's school's 5K race. I may try sooner than that if my times are promising. I've been running 3 times a week, with long runs up to 7 miles. This week I'm starting to do four a week, and next week I'll up the long run to 8 or 9. The hills are really working me, so that's good. Sometimes I feel like I'm running kind of fast, but I can't tell until I find my running watch and actually time myself. The weight loss is going okay, too, but I seem to have stopped at a certain weight for the last week. Hopefully the extra running day will help with that. And more disciplined eating. I'd love to lose seven more pounds by July 4, but that may be too ambitious. Certainly by the end of July, when we take a beach trip, should be doable. I've been doing a little weight lifting at home also, and that's going well. Word of advice, though; don't lift while watching The Colbert Report. You're likely to drop the weight on your foot and break it, like I almost did last night.

The only major thing going on in my life is that I'm on the precipice of buying a new car. I've chosen the Mitsubishi Outlander. It's a compact SUV/crossover. It's got the right combination of utility, gas mileage, and styling that I like. The problem is, I can't get the color I want in my state. I can have one delivered from another state, but I'll have to pay the transport cost. I should just get the silver one, though. It's not a bad color. Mistubishi is doing a $1000 rebate on the Outlander through June, but I need to wait until August to buy. They'll probably extend the rebate because Outlanders aren't selling so well, or I can talk the dealer down because the 2009 model will be coming out soon. We'll see. I'm looking forward to it.

On the entertainment front, I'm becoming a fan of USA's Burn Notice. I've been watching episodes from last season in preparation for the new season in July. Monk and Psych will also be coming back on USA in July. Other than that I'm watching Hell's Kitchen and So You Think You Can Dance. We've been recording Last Comic Standing, but only watched one. That show always frustrates me with the awful comics they pick, but I'll probably get into it once we catch up. Movie-wise I thought You Don't Mess With the Zohan looked funny, but I've heard awful things about it, so I'll skip it. I want to see Kung Fu Panda, I've heard good things about that from kids and adults. And M. Night Shyamalan's The Happening looks really freaky. That comes out tomorrow. I love the trailer with that scene of bodies falling off the roof. So eerie. I hope it's as good as it looks.

That's my anything for now. Still alive, coasting along. Talk to you soon. Feel free to drop any recent movie reviews in the comments. Thanks.

Movies, TV, and Pictures

2008-05-14T12:49:00.003-06:00

Movies

For the first time in a LONG time, I saw two new-release movies in the span of a little more than a week. It was exhilarating! The first movie I saw was "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" with my wife. I enjoyed it. It had a lot of funny parts, but it wasn't that great of a movie, per se. It was very choppy and awkward as a story, especially in the beginning. And a lot of the funny parts were just jokes thrown in, and didn't serve the story. By the end, though, I was rooting for the main character and left the theater entertained. Another strange thing about it was I went in excited to see Kristin Bell, and left pretty hot for Mila Kunis. I never looked at her that way before. What eyes!

The second movie was "Iron Man". I'm not a comic book geek to any degree, but I've always kind of liked Iron Man, even without knowing any of his back story. Everything I had seen leading up to the movie: casting, pictures, trailers, got me more and more excited. Well, the movie didn't disappoint. It was a great, fun movie. It had great action (although more would have been better), good humor (not too hokey or out of place), and a good, solid story that didn't get ridiculous. The performances were really good, too, with a very classy cast. My only problem with it has to do with the main villain and the final showdown. I don't want to give much away, but the final scenes didn't have the best action of the movie, and were a bit sloppy and quick in getting to the final conflict. Another weird thing: I went in excited to see Robert Downey, Jr. and left pretty hot for Gwyneth Paltrow. I've always liked her as an actress, but she never really "did it" for me that much. But seeing as she sometimes bears a quite striking resemblance to my wife, I wanted to see much more of her on screen. And her red hair looked great, too.

TV

Just a quick note about the returned shows that I'm enjoying. "The Office" has been great, and I'm so loving the impending Jim-Pam engagement. I can't get enough of Jim's psuedo-proposals. "30 Rock" ended really strong after starting kind of slowly for me after the strike. "How I Met Your Mother" has been hilarious the last few episodes, also after an iffy restart. I'm even enjoying Britney's guest appearances. "Reaper" has also shown improvement, with this week's ep introducing a very interesting twist. I hope that show gets renewed next season. And "Lost" is just kicking insane amounts of ass since its return. The next two weeks are going to be epic.

Pictures

We moved into our new house in late Fall last year. It snowed after we lived there for three days, and the ground was pretty much covered until early April. Now the yard has woken up to Spring, and we're discovering new things about our house. There are good things, like flowers and trees, seen here:

And bad things, like several breaks and leaks in the sprinkling system and the largest slug I've ever seen, found on the inside of one of our sprinkler valve boxes:

Man, sucker was huge! He's not even stretched out here. And what's with the spots? I've never seen a slug like that. It's some sort of Jaguar Slug.

My Life Now Has Purpose

2008-05-06T11:38:00.002-06:00

It's about time! I set a small goal for myself recently: to lose 4 pounds in two weeks. I thought that would be a nice little achievement that would start the snowball rolling to some significant weight loss. After one week of semi-disciplined eating and decent exercise, I lost zero pounds. I didn't gain anything, but my goal of 4 in two weeks is in serious jeopardy. Now I have a new goal, nay, a vision quest. That goal is to run a 5k in 22:39 or better. Let me explain from whence this purpose comes.

Some of you may know that I have been known to run. I like to think I'm a "runner" but I haven't run very consistently or well for over a year. I posted a personal best 5K time last April of 24:09. I was motivated to beat another blogger's time of about 24:30, and I accomplished it. I'll admit, I was pretty pleased with myself. But now the gauntlet has been thrown down. It's 22:39 or bust! Why 22:39? Well, apparently Mike Greenberg, of ESPN Radio's Mike and Mike in the Morning and ABC's Duel ran a 22:39 5k. Mike routinely mocks himself for not having any athletic ability, and he's 40. I can't call myself a quasi-runner and have Greeny smoke my best 5K time like that. So it's time to train. I've got a pretty good start. My new neighborhood is pretty hilly, so I get a lot of uphill work in my runs, which builds leg strength and makes running a more flat 5K course much easier. The key is now adding more runs into my week, and increasing my distance. That will be tricky with family obligations going on now, but after the first week of June, it should be easier. And the fact that winter has finally left makes it easier to get the good outdoor runs in, too.

Ideally, this will lead me to run consistently for years to come, and not just off and on like I've been doing. Then I can train for another marathon, eventually qualify for the Boston Marathon and run it. That's still my dream. Also, to truly beat Greeny, I'll have to beat 22:39 at age 40, so I'll have to keep it up for at least 6 more years. The great thing about this, too, is that the weight loss I desire should come hand in hand. The only thing I need is a time frame. I think 6 years is too long to achieve my vision quest. I need something shorter to really motivate me. So what do you think? One year? Six months? Three months? Let me know what you think a good deadline is. All reasonable suggestions will be counted in the vote (under 3 months is just not feasible, I think). I'll have to find a race to enter, too, to document my success, so there will have to be a little wiggle room on the exact time frame. Thanks for your help.

BTW, I'll write a bit on TV and movies a little later.

This space available...

2008-04-28T15:25:00.003-06:00

For whoring.

I don't have much to write, so if you want me to promote something of yours, I'm game. Just let me know.

My first client is my good friend Daisy Whitney. We met back in my swinging single Denver days, and she's good people. Squared. She's a tech and entertainment biz guru who runs a blog on TV Week.com and does a weekly video journal called "Daisy Whitney's New Media Minute." In truth, they haven't been as short as a minute for months, but they're always entertaining and informative. Here's her latest Minute promoting her new "Who's the hottest male video blogger" poll. The link to her poll on her blog is below the video.

Go vote here.

I'm not voting until at least one female votes. It's a Big Gay Sausage Party at the moment.

P.S. - Before my cruder commenters ask if I ever "hit that", the answer is no. First of all, she's married. Second, she said no.

Let me get a little serious and wistful for a minute

2008-04-18T11:27:00.004-06:00

I love Paul Simon, especially his 80s solo albums "Graceland" and "The Rhythm of the Saints". I was thinking about those albums when I read about Paul giving a concert in Brooklyn last week where he performed those two albums with a diverse cast of musicians. I wish I could have been there. With that in the back of my mind, my iPod (on album shuffle) landed on "Rhythm" this morning. The chorus of drums on "The Obvious Child" immediately lifted my spirits. When "Proof" came on, I had a hankering to see the video with Chevy Chase and Steve Martin, so I went to YouTube. In the list of related videos were a number of songs from the album Paul performed in a huge Central Park concert in 1991, so I watched some of those. And now I'm just full of emotions. Paul is such a genius songwriter, and he really did something special with the Rhythm album. To hear and see these songs performed with his huge, multinational band just adds to the incredible experience of his music. Go watch some of them, especially this one. "The Cool, Cool River". It makes me cry.

The Rhythm album always makes me think about a kid I went to high school with, Josh. He was a year below me, and I didn't know him very well. We used to hackey sack together after school and that's about it. One day I ran into Josh outside a record store and we said hi. I asked him what he bought. It was "The Rhythm of the Saints". I was kind of surprised to see a 16 year old kid buying Paul Simon. The year I started college, while Josh was still a senior, he died. I think he got Leukemia, but I can't really remember. While home on a break, I went to my high school's talent show and Josh's best friend sang a song in tribute to Josh. It was "Under the Bridge" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Apparently it was Josh's favorite song. The performance was an emotional moment, but frankly, Josh's friend couldn't sing. He was accompanied by a girl, who allegedly could sing, to do the high parts at the end, but she was just shreiking. I prefer to associate Rhythm of the Saints with Josh instead of that Chili Peppers song. It's such a beautiful album that spans the emotional spectrum from joy and hope to sadness and resignation. If you don't have it, I highly recommend it.

Okay, okay, I'll write

2008-04-14T15:00:00.002-06:00

Not that you asked me to, I just want to avoid the inevitable clamoring for more Reed. (That's what she said.)

Anyway, here's a short post about things I've been meaning to write about and/or to respond to comments:

1. New show reviews. The two new shows I'm reviewing are either over, or end tonight. How's that for timeliness?

Miss Guided - New half hour comedy on ABC that's already over. Judy Greer is an awesome, hilarious actress. She's also become gorgeous to me, like Tina Fey. Wow, does she shine in a leading role. The show is pretty funny, but some eps better than others. Chris Parnell is hilarious, and really helps the show. I think it's worth a pick up for next season. I have no idea if that call's been made yet, though.

New Amsterdam - Intriguing premise, not undone by the hokey "find true love and the curse will be broken" element. The actor playing John Amsterdam is good at conveying the unnerving yet charismatic immortal detective. Where the show falters a bit is the flashbacks to his life over the last 400 years. Each episode's present-day plot reminds him of an event in his past where he made a mistake, which presumably gives him a shot at redemption. This fails for two reasons: first, his historic occupations of the week are gimmickily (real word?) diverse, like Sam's missions from Quantum Leap; and second, it oversimplifies the human learning process. He learned to respect women who had been victimized by rape in the 1700s, but didn't learn not to cheat on his wife until 1908? I had high hopes for the character's past, but it turns out the flashbacks are the weakest part of the show because they're tied to the plot of the present instead of being plots themselves. The show's still pretty good. Good enough to keep me watching, but not enough to vociferously recommend.

2. Returning show reviews. Loved The Office, very well done. 30 Rock was kind of weak. From the sneak peak in the newest Entertainment Weekly, though, it sounds like it's going to pick up. I haven't watched either of the new Earls, but hope to soon. I love that show. Also, as a plug, if you get the chance on Sunday nights, watch Psych on NBC. It's a really funny show that's normally on USA, but NBC is using it as filler for now. It could use a boost in viewership, and I think it could do well on a main network.

3. Inconspicuous Attack Toad, aka Marisa. Thanks for visiting! Now explain your comment. Absurdist humor, or pertinent observation?

Have a Laugh on YouTube

2008-03-27T15:53:00.002-06:00

Found these today via WTF_OMGZ via Thighs Wide Shut.

1. This definitely beats The Viking's Not Gay Waxing System.

2. And with an endosement like this, how can McCain lose in November? Scary!

Spam of the Day: Double Shot

2008-03-25T14:15:00.003-06:00

I'm going to review two new TV shows soon, but I don't have the energy today, so here are a couple short, amusing spams.

I call this one The Pusher.

Sender: Pete Reese

Subject: drug addiction

We've got what you're looking for, at the best prices. Discreet.

http://www.tradepiece.com

Dr. Alton Newton

This is the first black market adoption spam I've ever seen.

Sender: Trudy Phillips

Subject: babyyyyyyyy

Instant worldwide shipping, friendly support guaranteed.

http://geraldinefreezehr.blogspot.com

Spam O' the Day

2008-03-20T09:13:00.002-06:00

Sender: lemon my

Subject: so scratch

Globally I wonder if this new technology will be beyond human

C A 4N A D/7AN P 0 4H A RM A 4CY

V/A \G _RA - $1.40
C 6/ A L / S - $2.22
S5 O M A - $0.63
L E8 V / T R A - $3.69
FEMALE V/AG\ R -A - $1.53
U 0 L T 5R A M - $1.37
102 Items on Sale Today.

Grab yours while supplies last

explanation for this. I can't understand how people can rely so

Operation "Win a Wii" Not Successful... Yet

2008-03-19T09:17:00.002-06:00

Sorry if I was too heavy on the drama yesterday. The relative importance of my request was admittedly low. I was just frustrated at not being able to identify the song. What I'm trying to do is win a radio station contest by naming the artists of 12 short song clips saying the word "crazy". The one I posted yesterday was the last one I needed to identify. With the complete list in hand, I needed to be caller 10 at a certain time, name all the artists, and I'd win a Wii. I called yesterday at the appointed time, and was caller number 8! That sucked. Luckily, caller 10 was stumped by the very clip I posted yesterday, so the contest continues today and I get another chance. I'll keep you posted on what happens.

I want to thank everyone who listened to the clip in an effort to help me. I appreciate you trying to lend a hand, or an ear, as it were. And special thanks again to the Rowdy Theologian. I still can't fathom how he listened to the clip and knew what song it was. In all my searches on lyrics sites and google, that band or song never came up.

The Most Important Blog Post I Will Ever Write

2008-03-18T09:44:00.012-06:00

Or that you will read!

Listen to this audio clip and tell me what you think is the artist and song title. Preferably tell me before 5 pm MDST.

I can't overstate the urgency of this request! Please give me your feedback.

Increase the Capacity Limit

2008-03-17T11:55:00.003-06:00

As most of us do, I get a lot of penis enlargement/erectile dysfunction medication spam. Today I happened to read the text of one and laughed, so I'm posting it here. Maybe I'll post my spam as a gimmick/means of posting somewhat regularly. Let's try it. The post title is the spam's subject line. Here's the body:

"The face of a man is usually an open book to most women.They can read practically anything in our faces.I’ve known ladies who could tell the size of my penis, bank account and the status of my sex life by taking only one look at me.Of course, the look was followed by the lady’s departure in the opposite direction."

Okay, I guess that's enough time

2008-03-07T14:51:00.002-07:00

I was waiting for some more votes/vigorous debate about the Bruins Ice Girls before I posted the results and my choice, but I think I have all the feedback I'm going to get. Here is the tally:

- Audrey pretty much ran away with the popular vote with 4 votes (no, you can't vote twice, KM) Frankly, I don't see it. She's cute, but does nothing for me.

- Emily and Shannon each got one vote. I kind of like Emily, but reading her interview she's clearly a redneck. Shannon is kind of cute, but a little weird around the eyes, and her interview answers are BORING!

- My lovely wife voted for Sam. She also guessed that Sam was my choice, apparently because my blonde wife doesn't believe I'm attracted to blondes (as opposed to brunettes). Frankly, I don't think much of Sam at all until you go to her interview and see the full picture of her. Her smile is much cuter in that full picture, and it's also apparent that she has the largest breasts of the Ice Girls. That helps, but she's a long way from my top. My favorite brunette of the group, btw, is Sydney

Only one other woman received a vote, and for the life of me I can't figure out why she wasn't the run-away winner: Katherine. She's adorable (though her hair's a bit flat) and has BY FAR the most interesting and hockey-centric interview. Plays classical music, likes to sit in a tree on the Esplanade along the Charles River, loves Wayne Gretzky, the list goes on and on how she trounces the competition in character. I admit, she comes off a bit braggy in spots, and I'm going to just overlook "Family Guy" as her favorite show, but the totality of her looks and interview make her the clear victor. Bliss is truly an inspired, intelligent man. Or maybe it's just that lawyers in their mid thirties with the same first name have similar tastes. ;-)

In the interest of full disclosure, I do have a #2. One of the Girls is actually more appealing to me at first glance, but slides behind Katherine after further study: Alexa. When I told my wife that, she nearly vomited. She thinks Alexa is a gross, dolled-up whore like Fasha or Whitney. I disagree. I do think she's not very "girl next door" natural looking, but I think she has a super cute face and could hang with the more glamorous Dallas Stars Ice Girls. To each their own, I guess.

Other Business

I was hoping for more reaction about Vampire Weekend, the indie band I wrote about two posts ago. I got their CD and it's really good. My favorite songs are still the 4 on their MySpace page, but the other tunes are good and growing on me. One of their songs ("A-Punk") has found a devoted fan in my 2 year old son. He demands that song be played whenever he's in the car, and pouts if I play another. Check them out.

In other music news, I was listening to a local rock station the other day. I pretty much despise FM music radio, but was bored with my CDs and sports radio so I flipped around. I settled on this rock station playing a Chili Peppers tune. The song they played next, though, was a very pleasant surprise: "Bringin' On the Heartbreak" by Def Leppard. I sang along in blissful nostalgia. It was a great time. At the end I excitedly hoped that the station would let the song continue into the instrumental "Switch 625", but it was not to be. Still, it was a very invigorating experience that started me thinking: Should I succumb to my sentimentality and add Def Leppard to my CD collection/iTunes library? Is that going too far? Would I feel ashamed after listening through the albums once or twice? Mind you, I'm only talking the early albums, even excluding their pop breakthrough/sell-out "Hysteria". But then would I have to take the next logical step and replenish my Bryan Adams collection, too? That really would be embarrassing. Maybe I could just get "Reckless"... and "Into the Fire". I'm still thinking it over, but sampling the albums on Amazon is definitely pushing me in one direction.

WHAT?!?! Another post? It's only been a couple of days!

2008-02-22T11:55:00.009-07:00

It must be very cold in Hell right about now. Anyway, I've decided to post again to renew a feature I did probably two years ago, but I can't really remember when or on which blog I did it.

It's time to Pick Your Favorite Bruins Ice Girl! My favorite sports team, the Boston Bruins, recently anonuced their Ice Girls for the season. Ice Girls are like cheerleaders for hockey. They skate around and give out free crap during intermissions, shovel ice shavings, and make public appeances to promote the team. They're a somewhat recent phenomenon in the NHL, and don't really serve much of a purpose. But they can be fun to look at, and provide me material for a post. If TWG happens to come by and read this, please spare me the spiel about "The Red Wings are too pure and awesome to engage in the sacrilege that is the Ice Girls." Just pick one. I know you like girls. :-)

Without any further ado, here are this year's Ice Girls*. Click on the picture to go to that girl's bio page. You should make your decision based on looks as well as answers to the silly bio questions. They're people, after all, not just skating pieces of meat.

Alexa............... Andrea............ Audrey

Emily............... Fasha.............. Grier

Jaime.............. Jenn................. Julez

Katherine.......... Kim.................. Megan

Rebecca.............. Sam............ Shannon

Sydney............ Whitney

I'm not particularly impressed with the group as a whole this year. There are some cuties, but one of them runs away with the prize in my book. She wins by a mile. I'll be interested to see if your picks match up with mine. I'll anounce my pick, and the results of the voting, in *gasp* another post in a few days! Have a great weekend until then.

* I couldn't get the names to line up right with the pictures, and I'm too lazy to make it better. It should be good enough.

Like a whale coming up for air...

2008-02-20T15:32:00.004-07:00

So do I periodically rise to write a short, insignificant post. Here are a couple things on my mind:

I went to Portland last weekend to chaperone and semi-coach a college mock trial team. I also judged some rounds. It was really fun, even though appellate-style moot court was way more my thing in law school than doing trials. The team has asked me to be their coach next year, and the school may even create a class and hire me as an adjunct professor to teach it! That's pretty exciting. Whatever happens, I'm going to have to do a lot of brushing up on trial advocacy.

I still can't really believe the Patriots lost the Super Bowl. Sure, the Giants' D-line played really well and hassled Brady, but the Giants victory came down to being really lucky on their last drive. Two dropped interceptions, a foiled sack, and Tyree's most unlikely of catches combined to kill the Pats. Other than Manning getting free of the sack, he didn't really perform that well on the drive. He wasn't efficient, wasn't really that composed. It just shouldn't have ended that way. Fuck!

I found out last night that while I was in Portland, one of my favorite musicians was also in town giving a concert that I didn't know about. That kind of sucked.

Speaking of music, I may have found a new band I like. I didn't really find them. This band is kind of the hot new indie thing, I think. They are what Clap Your Hands Say Yeah were a year or so ago: a minimalist, neo-New Wave band from New York creating a lot of buzz. I don't really care for such bands, but this band has something vey interesting to their sound. The band is called Vampire Weekend, and the only way to really describe their music is lo-fi pop with an African tinge. Kind of like The Talking Heads recording with Paul Simon's Graceland band, but catchier and less intricate. You can check them out on their Myspace page, where they have 4 songs for listening. I've only heard those 4 songs, so I'm not entirely sure how much I like them. But the initial listening has drawn me in. They're supposed to play a show in my home town in late March, and I'm going to try to see the show.

Lost is kicking so much ass this season, it's really not fair to any other show. SOOOOO fucking good. I'm excited about the strike being over, but really, all I care about is Lost. Thankfully, the strike's end means that they'll be able to film the rest of Lost's 13-episode season.

I haven't seen any movies I've wanted to for several months, and nothing that's up for an Oscar. I'm pulling for Daniel Day Lewis because I'm his bitch. From what I've read about Hal Holbrook's "Into the Wild" performance and long career, I think it would be cool for him to win Supporting Actor, even though Javier Bardem will probably run away with it. That's about the extent of my Oscar interest this year.

That's all for now. Talk to you again sometime.

He can talk!

2008-01-28T13:24:00.000-07:00

Explorer just crashed and ate the whole post I just wrote!! Fucking A!

Here's the short version.

1. Title references "Planet of the Apes: The Musical" from The Simpsons.

2. I am very stupid for scheduling a business trip this Sunday, effectively making me miss my beloved Patriots play in the Super Bowl. I'll get to watch it on DVR next Friday after I get back.

3. Saw this on Post Secret and I liked it enough to post it here:

4. I'm excited for Lost to come back this Thursday, and watching reality TV in the mean time. Actually enjoying The Celebrity Apprentice for the ridiculous egos and how The Donald kisses up to people who are famous, even if they're less famous than he.

Sorry, but I don't have the energy to rewrite that in a modestly entertaining way.

5. And my iPod brought up what may be my absolute favorite piece of music ever in the whole world. Beethoven's 9th Symphony, 3rd movement. Maybe it's cliche since the 9th is so famous, but listen to that movement and tell me it's not heartbreakingly beautiful.

Solidarity

2008-01-08T10:29:00.000-07:00

As suggested by The Rowdy Theologian in the comments to my last post over one month ago, I'm symbolically not blogging to show support for the Writers Guild of America and their strike. Non-symbolically, I haven't been blogging because my life is boring and there's nothing to say. Life is okay, holidays were good. The house is great but cold. There's nothing on TV (thus contributing to my lack of posts), and Ohio State got humiliated in the National Championship Game by an SEC team for the second year in a row. All this makes for a very uninspired Reed. I fill the hours now by playing Scrabulous on Facebook. I love it, but I mostly play against my genius friend who beats me every time, thus killing my win-loss percentage. So if you know how to find me there, stop by and play Scrabble with me.

Home Sweet Home!

2007-12-06T13:39:00.000-07:00

Here are some shots of the new house. We had a pretty good snowfall a couple days after we moved in, so me and the older boy made an inaugural snowman.

Those were the only two sticks in the backyard, and they happened to work quite well for arms.

The view from our front door.

As far as any entertaining stories of the frustrations of moving, there are some. But we're so happy to be done, and so happy with the house, that I'm no longer dwelling on the problems.

So what's there to talk about? Only TV, but I haven't been watching much lately. With Prison Break on winter hiatus, we've been able to watch How I Met Your Mother. I really like that show, but this season seems a bit less funny than seasons past. I'm dreading the end of "in-the-can"episodes and hope that the writer's strike ends soon. If not, I still have Arrested Development and Veronica Mars on DVD to fill the time.

It's done! (kind of)

2007-11-26T14:54:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the long silence, but as you can imagine, I've been busy with sorting out details of the new house. On top of that, I've had to travel for work the past two week, including Thanksgiving week. Strangely enough, travel last Wednesday was a breeze. I flew back from Canada, which celebrates Thanksgiving in October, so there was no congestion there. Coming back into the states, though, was quiet. My hometown airport was empty, in the gates, the restaurants, and the baggage claim. It was pretty weird.

The good news is that we have closed on both transactions today! The title issues have been resolved, and the sellers are fixing the things we asked for. Now all we need is for the loans to fund and the deeds to record and we'll have a new house tomorrow. Then we get to move all our shit, which is terribly exciting, as you can guess. We've already rented a truck and loaded it. It's full right now, waiting to go, but there's absolutely no furniture in it. We'll have to do that stuff on a second run. Hopefully we won't need a third.

So that's the update. I'll write again once we're in.

The Good, The Bad, and The Even Worse

2007-11-09T12:46:00.001-07:00

The Good:

As I mentioned, we sold our house and have bought a new one. We're supposed to close on both deals the last week of November, and move in sometime that week. It's quick, but very exciting. The house we bought is in a great neighborhood, in a great town. It's over twice as big as the one we're in now. We love the layout, and most importantly, my wife likes the kitchen. There will be some issues to take care of the first few months/year we're in it, but it's very live-able as is right now. We looked at it about two months ago, and it's been our favorite ever since. We made an offer on it two months ago but it fell through. Turns out that happened because of our incompetent agent. We have a new agent now, and the house was still on the market, so we got it. Moving is going to be a big pain, but we'll soldier through it and reap the benefits.

The Bad:

With the sale of our house approaching finalization, the house threw us a curve. The toilet (yes, THE toilet, we have only one) clogged. When this happens, a short bout of plunging solves it. My wife plunged a bit and the water wasn't going down. So I plunged, and it wasn't going down. So I plunged some more, and it wasn't going down. My wife looked up some toilet-unclogging advice online and found out about toilet auger . It's a drain snake with a curved tube for insertion up into the toilet and a crank handle for turning while you cram it into the drain. I went to Home Depot and bought one. I bought the cheapest one, about $8. There were $30 and $40 models that I thought were more than I needed. I got it home and struggled with it a bit, but finally got through the serpentine drain. When I pulled it out, there was a bit of crap in its bore-end (basically a cork-screw made from loosening the coils of the long spring). It had taken a core sample from the offending clog. But the toilet still wouldn't drain or flush.

I figured the 3 foot auger wasn't long enough, so I went back to Home Depot and bought a 25 foot drain snake for about $12. I got that home and tried to cram in into the toilet, but couldn't navigate past the first turn inside the toilet. My hands, already sore from all the plunging I did, had trouble turning and pushing the coiled spring while submerged in the toilet water. Plus, I without the plastic tube of the auger, I was scratching the shit out of the porcelain at the bottom of the toilet bowl. I decided to combine the best features of the snake and the auger: put the long snake through the auger's tube. To do this, I had to use pliers to shrink the auger's bore end so I could pull it through the tube. Then I put the snake's skinny end (non bore) through the tube and forced that into the toilet. It took a while to get it around the curves, but I did, and put about 10-12 feet of it in. Still no dice.

My next idea was to cut the part of the tube off so I could go back to the auger device, but be able to get more of it into the toilet. I did that, got about three inches more of the spring into the toilet, but nothing changed. So I turned to my last idea. I pulled the auger spring out and then shrunk the bore end of the snake to fit it into the shortened auger tube. That took a while, as the wire on the snake was particularly recalcitrant. I did get it, though, then I proceeded to methodically push the snake through the toilet and pipes. I probably put about 22 feet of the snake into that damn toilet, but it didn't work. I finally called it quits after about four hours and two very sore, gray hands (the metal of the snake wearing off on my skin).

The next morning I called a plumber, who came and charged us $100 to stick his super-duper-professional-auger-with-extra-large-swivel-head into the toilet three times. Of course, that worked like a charm. So what have we learned? That I am a very bad plumber, but that I am stubbornly persistent, almost to a fault. Hopefully the buyer doesn't get mad about the scratches in the toilet bowl.

The Even Worse:

While I was battling with the toilet, our real estate agent called and informed my wife that the man selling our new house to us is not, in fact, on the title to said house and property. His ex-wife is the one on the title. O, frabjous day! No word yet on how they're going to resolve this before we close. Hopefully there's no bad blood between the two.

Bonus - The Really Good:

Heroes! It's dangerously close to having too many independent storylines, but they're doing an awesome job with the stories they're telling. I love it so far.

And 30 Rock this week was really good, as well. It's been kind of off this season. Sometimes it tries too hard with jokes, and it's also turning into a live-action Family Guy; filled with silly cut-takes showing what the characters have just mentioned. Not as lame as Family Guy, but still pretty disappointing to see them relying on that device.

Last New TV review and Annual Pumpkin Parade

2007-11-02T08:58:00.001-06:00

I'll keep this short because, of the two new shows I've been able to watch, one's been cancelled and the other one's not very interesting.

1. Viva Laughlin - I've made no secret of my man-crush on Hugh Jackman, so it's no surprise that I gave Viva Laughlin, a musical drama, a chance. While it was probably tied with Cavemen in the race for most negative pre-season buzz, I thought the promo of Hugh singing "Sympathy for the Devil" was great. The show, though, was pretty dumb. I'm not a big fan of musicals, but simply being a musical isn't what failed. It was the execution. Not only were most of the numbers cheesy, but they had the characters singing while the originals were playing behind them, like they were singing along to the radio. That was really dumb, and distracting. Plus, having Melanie Griffith sing was a huge mistake, too. Combine those things with a protagonist who's an asshole, boring family sidestories, and a lukewarm murder mystery, it's no surprise it was cancelled after two episodes aired over four days. The only positive of the show (aside from Hugh, of course) was Madchen Amick. I've heard of her before, and probably seen her in movies and pictures, but I was never aware of how totally cute and hot she is. Rowrr!

2. The Next Great American Band - I don't know why I thought the producers of American Idol wouldn't ruin the concept of finding good bands. Silly me. This show is a major disappointment. I watch Idol, but my musical tastes are much more band-oriented, so I thought this show had a chance to be good. Of course, almost every band the judges chose for the finals is either a gimmick band or horribly derivative. The most interesting bands on the show are the Bluegrass band, the trio of revival minister's sons playing a smoking country-bluegrass mix, and the gospel/funk/hard rock band from Philly with incredible musicians. That Philly band, Franklin Bridge, WAY overdid their songs on the second episode, though. They have a shot to win, my other favorites probably don't, though. I'll keep watching to fill my Friday nights and see who wins, but I'm not very excited about it.

And now for this year's pumpkins! (This is for ACW, a much superior carver of pumpkins).

My 7 year old son carved his a few weeks ago, and did a great job. Unfortunately, it started decaying well before Halloween, as you can see here:

The small pumpkin above was decorated by my 2 year old boy with markers. He's so proud of it. Whenever he walks by it he points to it and tells us it's his pumpkin.

I didn't carve mine until the night before Halloween, and was up pretty late doing it. I tried some new ideas this year, which like every year, are better in theory than execution. Here it is in daylight:

The eye shape came out well, but they look crooked because of the tilt of the pumpkin. I didn't draw the shapes with the pumpking standing as it would on the porch, so my bad. The menacing teeth design was a last-second idea. Unfortunately, I couldn't make the lines quite wide enough to really show the teeth and allow for the light to come through. Here it is lit up:

By the time Halloween came around, my son's pumpkin looked a lot like a zombie, so the decay worked out well.

Here is a blurry photo of the pumpkins lit up on Halloween night:

Meh. Better luck next year. Hope you all had a great Halloween!

P.S. - Oh yeah, we sold our house and bought a new one! I'll try to write more about that soon.

New TV Review Part Trois

2007-10-17T09:46:00.000-06:00

Where have I been? I've been here, just lazy. On the one hand that's bad for this TV review feature because I've forgotten some of my impressions of the new shows I've watched. On the other hand it's good because I can give follow up reviews of subsequent episodes of other shows. First with the new:

Pushing Daisies - I really was looking forward to this show. It's created by the same guy who did one of my favorite shows of the past decade: Wonderfalls. It also has one of Wonderfalls' actors in it, Lee Pace (sadly, not Caroline Dhavernas). The show defintely has a unique visual style and quirky character, aside from the interesting premise. If you're not familiar with the premise: Ned (Pace) has the power to bring dead people back to life by touching them. If he touches them again, they die for good. If he doesn't re-touch someone he's brought back within one minute, someone else dies. (This fact creates tension and a major plot point.) Because of his power, he isolates himself from the rest of the world, running a pie shop. When a private detective discovers his power, he enlists Ned as a partner where Ned reanimates someone murdered, asks the person how they died, and he and the PI collect the reward money when they solve the case.

The best way I can describe the quirky style of the show is that if you didn't know otherwise, you'd swear it was done by Tim Burton. From the neogothic set design, robust colors, whimsical characters, and charming English accent voice-over, Burton's influence is undeniable. That style melds beautifully with the show's concept, making Pushing Daisies the most unique and intriguing new show of the season. And the cast is top-notch. I really like it, but I have some doubts about its staying power. The style is well suited to a movie, but it may become grating or old over several episodes with new plots each week. We'll see.

Life - I decided to try this out on the recommendation of another blogger. It airs the same time as Dirty Sexy Money, with which I wasn't too enamored. It's the story of a police detective who is convicted of a murder and sentenced to life in prison. After he is exonerated with DNA evidence, he gets released, awarded a huge settlement for his troubles, and decides to go back to work as a detective. While in prison he's gained a new Zen calm that he brings to his police work, and also an almost unnatural love of fruit.

It sounds quirky, but it doesn't really come off that way. The show is a serious police procedural, and so his personality quirks seem a bit out of place. Adam Arkin stars as his friend, and he's great (in the limited time he had in the episode). The rest of the main cast I could take or leave. Nothing too exciting. For the most part, I'm pretty blah about the show. Damian Lewis, who plays the freed detective Charlie Crews, actually comes off kind of creepy with the Zen and fruit fetish. Having red hair doesn't help (see e.g. Ginger Kids). It was this creepiness that probably confused me a bit about the show's ongoing plot arc (not seeing the pilot also contributed to this confusion, I'm sure).

The show uses interviews of people who participated in Crews' conviction, who are convinced of his guilt regardless of the evidence. I thought that this was supposed to plant doubt about his innocence, and stretch out the mystery of who he really is: killer or not. I think instead the plot is that Crews really is innocent, and that he spends the season trying to figure out who framed him and why. This conspiracy plot is much less interesting to me than the possibility of him being a killer and the audience trying to figure it out. It would make him a great anti-hero, and would explain our uneasy reaction to the character. This show is unlikely to go on my DVR schedule, but I'm going to give it another try this week. One interesting bit I noticed in the second episode, though: the actress who plays Crews' former-partner's wife is Meredith Salenger, the busty teen girl in such movies as "Dream a Little Dream" and "A Night in the Life of Jimmy Reardon". I remember her fondly.

Here are some short follow-up reviews:

Cavemen - Episode two was pretty dumb, but not awful. Episode three last night was better. Pretty funny. I just don't see why people are calling this a TV travesty.

Reaper - Still awesome.

Dirty Sexy Money - Still uninteresting and thin on character depiction. The "big mystery" developments don't pull me in, either.

Moonlight - Dumb dumb dumb.

Journeyman - Haven't watched a second ep. I may have to start recording it, though, because the tail end of Heroes keeps getting cut off by the DVR, so we'll have to watch it at the start of Journeyman. If anyone is liking Journeyman, let me know and I'll check out another episode.

I think there may be one or two more new shows I'm going to check out, so there may be a couple more of these posts. After that I'll review the shows I used to write about, like The Office, 30 Rock, Earl, Heroes, etc. In the meantime, here are some pictures I took at my house that I meant to post a while back.

Look what was hanging out on the front of our house:

Sucker was huge! That's the before, here's the after:

The stain is still on the brick. I've been too lazy to clean it off.

New TV Review, Part Two

2007-10-03T15:06:00.000-06:00

Dirty Sexy Money - I've never watched a show starring Peter Krause, but for some reason I really like him. He has some weird likability that makes you root for him. Has he ever played an all-out bad guy? Anyone know? Anyway, I didn't have many expectations or preconceptions about the show going in. Having watched the first episode, I'm not sold. It's too slick in terms of its depiction of the uber-rich family The Darlings. Each of the children seem like shallow, one-dimensional stereotypes, except for the hateful minister son, who's a shallow, one-dimensional out-of-left-field character. One blogger (I'm not sure if she'll swing by here and read this) calls it campy, but I disagree. I think the family is supposed to be taken seriously. Sure they do scandalous or laughable things, but they're supposed to be basically believable. This is a drama, after all. It's not like the Bluth family from Arrested Development, where you know it's a setup for silliness and you happily suspend your disbelief over the ridiculous qualities of the family members. Only the mother is somewhat believable, and only Donald Sutherland's eerie, goofy patriarch is interesting.

I also think the story moved along too quickly at the beginning, showing us each family member, how the family operates, and injecting our hero into the mix. And speaking of our "hero", he's supposed to be a dedicated family man trying to avoid the same career pitfalls of his deceased father that forced his mother out and effectively saw him raised by the Darlings. But then, with the promise of tons of money, he takes the job as the Darlings' family attorney on the spot without a word to his (adorable) wife. And further, the wife doesn't really care. When his new gig forces Peter's character to miss picking up his young daughter from school, the wife is easily placated with the opportunity to dress up and attend a lavish party. I was kind of encouraged by the "twist" at the end of the episode that seemed to introduce a season-long mystery, so I may watch the show again, just not this week because I'm giving NBC's Life a chance. But overall, it's a bad combination of taking itself too seriously while being just a little too fantastical. If it were more of the latter, it might interest me as an escapist soap (like Desperate Housewives).

Moonlight - I don't know what about this show attracted me. It wasn't the casting of Jason Dohring from Veronica Mars, because I was curious before I heard he was in it. I guess the idea of a vampire private investigator just sounded kind of cool (not having watched Angel at all). Well, the show's pretty dumb. It's very cliched all around: the script, the vampire mythology, the crime-procedural aspect. It even rips off "Interview With the Vampire" at the beginning for some exposition. They showed a preview of the rest of the season at the end which leads me to believe it might get better and less clumsy in subsequent episodes, but not good enough to watch again. Blah.

Cavemen - I love the GEICO cavemen ads. For that reason alone, I decided to give Cavemen a chance, knowing that almost everyone on the planet thought it was a horrible idea to import a commercial gag into a sitcom format. Flame me all you want (or just politely disagree) but I really liked the show. Let me start by saying that it's almost nothing like the commercials. The actors aren't the same, which is a bummer. The setup isn't the same, either, which turns out to be a good thing. If the show focused on cavemen obsessing over a particular prejudicial wrong, such as GEICO's insensitive ad, the show would fizzle. Instead it's a straight, standard sitcom with cavemen just living in the world. The "species" issue isn't used for satire on race relations, it's just a jumping off point for jokes (when a caveman is upset over a girl, his sheepish coworker asks if he's going to bite him). The cavemen have jobs, are grad students, play Wii, play squash, have relationships, drink coffee, etc. There's no real discrimination to overcome. If anything, the prejudice is reversed. One character harps on his rule of never dating "sapes", or homo sapiens. This leads to some funny lines. His slogan to remember the rule, "Only put your penis in the same genus." But this miscegenation is more an academic conviction than a social prejudice. At one point he condones his friend abandoning the exclusionary practice as long as he promises it will only be a physical thing.

Verdict: it's a conventional sitcom with the advantage of single-camera location shooting and witty writing. Also, seeing ridiculous cavemen in the situations provides a laugh in itself. A review of comments on Ain't It Cool News today saw the show roundly panned as one of the worst in history. But I suspect that those people had prejudged the show before it aired. They need to open their minds and see that cavemen can be funny, too. It's going on my regular DVR schedule.

Next up: Life and Pushing Daisies, for which I'm getting very excited.

P.S. on returning shows - The Office and My Name is Earl were hilarious last week. Prison Break is kind of lame this season, and Heroes is interesting (only watched the first ep), but it's not wowing me yet.

What's New, Pussycat?

2007-09-27T13:32:00.000-06:00

A whole lot, that's what! There are a whole bunch of new shows on the TV networks this year. Last year I was a bit jaded by the end of the TV season, resolving to retreat into a cocoon of a select few trusted shows by trimming my regular schedule (bye bye, silly melodrama of Gray's Anatomy), and not having any interest in the new crop to come. That stance has softened over the summer so that I'm willing to give several new shows a try for at least one episode. Here are the first two:

Journeyman (NBC Mondays) - Seeing the commercials for this over the summer, it didn't appeal to me at all. Fox's New Amsterdam seemed more interesting to me (although it looks like it won't air until January, and reading the summary, it looks schmaltzier than I thought). A blogger I read got a sneak preview and recommended it, so I gave it a try. I really liked the first episode. The way they handle the time travel is very similar to the book The Time Traveller's Wife, which I loved. There was an interesting mystery about the dead fiancee, too. But then the last five minutes happened and it ruined it for me. The overly dramatic conclusion with his wife, and the realization that he's going to travel back in time every week to do some random good deed killed it for me. Quantum Leap was fun, and I was also in high school when I watched it. I don't need to see it again. I'm not even interested in the fiancee storyline anymore, which I'm sure they'll drag out all season long. I did like the star, Kevin McKidd, though his American accent wasn't very consistent.

Reaper (The CW Tuesdays) - Again, this is a show I read a bit about in the spring, but I wasn't keen on because of another show I read about called Pushing Daisies (from the creator of one of my faves, Wonderfalls). I read a review of it in EW last week and decided it was worth a shot. Man, am I glad I tuned in! It was awesome! Here's the unique premise: guy finds out on his 21st birthday that his parents sold his soul to the Devil before he was born. Now Satan is collecting the debt and enlists the guy to capture evil souls that have escaped Hell. Intriguing, for sure, but what sells it are the snarky characters. It's really funny. I highly recommend it. Kevin Smith directed the first episode, and may direct more later. Let's hope the non-Kevin eps are just as good. Check it out. They're rerunning the first episode tonight.

That's all for now, but I'm planning on watching a bunch more and writing them up here. Next show is tonight's Dirty Sexy Money. I'm staying far the hell away from Private Practice. Ugh.

Finally, a review of the new music I got for my birthday

2007-09-26T09:04:00.000-06:00

I know it's a bit late, but I'm sure some of you would like to hear about the CDs I got with the generous Amazon gift certificate my wife gave me for my birthday. I'll list them in ascending order of my level of excitement and anticipation, and then I'll give a short review of each one.

8. Guster - Satellite EP. I love Guster, and respect how they've matured and evolved their sound over the years, but I've also liked each new album a little less than the previous one. The last album I truly loved was "Lost and Gone Forever". I've only listened to this once through, and it didn't make a huge impression on me. This is more of a collection CD, where I make sure I have all the releases from my favorite bands.

7. Michael Penn - Palms and Runes, Tarot and Tea. This is a kind of "Greatest Hits" for Michael, but not really. I usually don't buy greatest hits albums, but this has some unreleased stuff and alternate takes/demos of album songs. It's another collection CD. I'm pretty disappointed, actually. There are at least three songs left off I feel should definitely be on there, and both the unreleased and alternate-version tracks are nothing special.

6. Queens of the Stone Age - Era Vulgaris. I love "Songs for the Deaf" and "Lullabies to Paralyze" by this band. Josh Homme is one tier down from Jimmy Page in terms of rockin' riff genius. The band just flat out rocks, but in a creative, unique way. This is their newest, and it hasn't got a lot of great press. I really like it, though. Good, rocking QOTSA album.

5. Queens of the Stone Age - Rated R. This, their second album, was kind of a collection CD, but I also read great reviews of it. I like it a lot, but it doesn't rival "Songs for the Deaf", and I actually like "Era" better. Maybe it will grow on me the way "Lullabies" did.

4. Rush - Snakes and Arrows. Fresh off seeing a great concert by this band and regretting not being familar with the songs they played from this album, I was really looking forward to this CD. I was excited that there were 3 (three!!!) instrumentals on it. Having listened to it a few times, though, I'm not that in love with album. There's a lack of energy to the music, except for two of the instrumentals, and a lot of it sounds too similar to other recent albums. Just reading the lyrics, I like the themes Neil Peart explores on the album, but it's clumsy in execution. It seems that I'm constantly in the minority among Rush fans about what's a good album and what's a weak one. Vapor Trials, their last release, is much better in my opinion(although apparently the sound mixing on that album is horrendous).

3. Elliott Smith - New Moon. This is a two-disc compilation of unreleased Elliott Smith material. I was way psyched to get this, even though I already had almost half of the songs from my illegal downloading days. Listening through the discs, it is great, but not revelatory. I'm sure the unfamiliar songs will grow on me, but this is more like a collection CD... a very important one.

2. The Dead Milkmen - Beelzebubba. I'm a big DM fan. I started listening to them in high school when my hard core fan friend copied a tape for me. I bought this album on tape and loved it. It's the one that has "Punk Rock Girl" on it, and lots of other great stuff. Somewhere along the way I lost those first two tapes I had, but started buying CDs of other albums from used CD stores. I never found those first two albums, though, so it was time to rectify that. This album is great. It hasn't aged at all since its release.

1. The Dead Milkmen - Big Lizard in my Backyard. As you might guess, this was the first DM album I had, the copy made by my friend. It has a lot of sentimental value attached to it, so it was the first CD I listened to once I got the package. Not only was I not disappointed, my expectations were far exceeded. Talk about timeless! You hear people and critics say things like "there's not a bad song on the album" and they're wrong. There are always weak links on an album. This album is as close to an exception as there will ever be. Only the last song, a quasi-instrumental that goes on a bit long, can be considered a lessening of the quality of the other 20 tracks. You know I'm not one of those bloggers that trade in hyperbole. So trust me when I say that this is easily one of the greatest albums of the 80s, nay, of all time. Incredibly consistent, listenable, clever, funny, musically compelling (listen to those bass lines!), full of incisive social satire as well as just plain nonsense. Classic. I shit you not.

That's that. Stay tuned for a new series I hope to start today reviewing some new TV shows this season. Thank God TV is back so I have something to write about.

This post is interactive, Bitch.

2007-09-14T11:29:00.000-06:00

Well, kind of. It's a meme. Dara over at blah blah blog posted this today, and I thought it sufficiently interesting to do it, as well. Here are the instructions:

Copy this list, leave in the bands you've seen perform live, delete the ones you haven't, and add new ones that you have seen until you reach 25. An asterisk means the previous person had it on their list. Two asterisks means the last two people who did this before you had that band on their list.

Here's my list (in no particular order). Play along if you like, and let me know if you do.

1. Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers**
2. Foo Fighters
3. Bob Dylan**
4. Red Hot Chili Peppers
5. Barenaked Ladies
6. The B-52's
7. Rush
8. Phish
9. Belly
10. Mighty Mighty Bosstones
11. Bim Skala Bim
12. Indigo Girls
13. Tanya Donelly
14. Bob Mould
15. Athenaeum
16. Guster
17. Thanks to Gravity
18. Hey Mercedes
19. The Breeders*
20. Braid
21. Motion City Soundtrack
22. Piebald
23. .Moneen.
24. Blonde Redhead
25. Josh Rouse

Here's some more music fun. I happened to hear Billy Ocean's "When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Going" today, and started bopping along. I loved that song back in the day. Who can name the movie soundtrack on which that song appeared?

About the New England Cheatriots, I'll only say this: Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

I don't have much to say about Spamalot. It was fun. Not great. To someone so enamored of all things Python, I didn't particularly enjoy the parts adapted from the movie. They're not as funny as in their original contexts (although the French taunting gets ratcheted up about 300 notches). Also, I wasn't keen on how it borrowed bits from other movies and TV show skits. But the performers were very good. The Lady in the Lake is a great addition, and the original bits were enjoyable. There are a couple parts in Act II that quite surprised me (can't believe I never heard about them) that I won't spoil. A good time, but not life changing, and not as good as original Python.

Have a good weekend, all.

Man, that was laborious!

2007-09-05T15:29:00.000-06:00

Well, my real birthday is now passed, and I'd like to thank all you who acknowledged my blog's birthday, mentioned in my last post.

Here's a list of things I received for my birthday, in good and bad sublists:

Good:
Amazon gift card
Spamalot tickets
Dinner and movie date
Two frozen Gino's East pizzas
Hot sex
Extra sleep
Overstock.com gift card
Movie theater gift card
News that Kristin Bell is joining the cast of Heroes next season for an extended run
A cheesecake
A homemade Tres Leches cake
Michigan football's humiliating defeat at the hands of Appalachian State
Cleared-up sinuses

Bad:
Stomach virus and attendant vomiting
Fever
Lack of desire to eat Tres Leches cake ever again

It was a good long weekend, only the end of which was ruined by the illness. All I had planned, though, was to weed my yard, so watching TV instead wasn't so bad. Seriously, all I watched over the weekend was college football, reruns of Preseason NFL games and house flipping shows. Good times. Now I have to get back into the swing of work, which is tough. No real news on the moving front. Our initial offer on a house should be rejected or countered by the end of today, otherwise it lapses. It looks like we won't sell our house until next year, since the market's so flooded. It's a bit discouraging.

That's all. More later, after I get cool stuff with the Amazon card.

Happy Birthday!

2007-08-28T15:58:00.000-06:00

To my son, of course, but I also just realized that this blog had its first anniversary a couple days ago. That snuck up on me.

Here's a picture of the birthday boy in a shirt from his Gammie. Man, he's getting so big, but still so cute. His hair is out of control, but everyone loves it.

Wow, he's growing so fast. Both boys are.

In house news, we found one we really like, and are going to make an offer on it. We'll have to make the offer conditional on selling ours, though. Let's hope for the best.

And Daisy asked for my review of Half Blood Prince. It's now my favorite of the Harry Potter books that I've read (replacing Prisoner of Azkaban). I knew about the big shocker at the end, but there were still surprises for me, and how that shocker played out was thrilling and devastating. I'm all jacked up to read Deathly Hallows now.

My one complaint with the book, and that applies to pretty much all of the books, is that Harry is a lazy student and not a very good wizard. The only true wizarding skill he's demonstrated on his own is doing the Patronus charm. Everything else is handed to him, it seems. Is that supposed to reflect how kids are these days? He doesn't have to be a prodigy, but give your hero some amount of ambition, work ethic, or skill. Sheesh!

The Virus Has Struck

2007-08-24T09:20:00.000-06:00

As most of you probably know, I have two young boys. One is about to turn 2 (THIS SUNDAY!) and the other is 7. The 7 year old is very much a "boy's boy". He loves guns and video games and cars and wrestling and action movies. He's a sweet boy, but he loves his violence, too. That's why I thought that we were immune to the sickness that has swept the nation over the past two years. Unfortunately I was wrong.

My son now loves High School Musical.

Last night he couldn't stop singing and dancing at the dinner table, singing a small section of an HSM2 song over and over and over (and over and over). He saw the movies at his cousins' house. I didn't think it would take with him so strongly, but he's growing up and moving on from only liking cartoons to liking live-action fare. He loves Nickelodeon's "Drake and Josh" and "Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide", which is not so bad. I dig Nick cartoons, and there's some funny stuff on D&J and Ned's. (Although I do worry that my son will think that every pretty girl in high school is a whore because they all kiss Drake at the drop of a hat.) Unfortunately he also likes shows from that member of the Evil Triumvirate,* Disney. Hannah Montana, The Suite Life of Zach and Cody, and now High School Fucking Musical. What's a dad to do? I'm sure he'll grow out of it. Maybe this spring when we start him in lacrosse. Hopefully he and his teammates won't break into an impromptu rendition of "Get Your Head in the Game" on the practice field, though.

Now, in "musicals that hopefully don't suck" news, my wife is taking me to Spamalot for my birthday! I'm very excited. She asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and told her just gift cards for music. But then I saw a billboard for Spamalot and called her to tell her about it. She tried to play ignorant for a while but couldn't. She had already bought tickets weeks before. I love my wife!

Have a great weekend, folks!

* The other two being, of course, Coke and McDonald's.

Reports of my death, though hopeful, are greatly exaggerated

2007-08-09T08:58:00.001-06:00

Holy cow, I had to think for a minute when entering my password to log into Blogger. It's been a while, eh? Either my life is too boring, or I'm way too unimaginative to spin my life's events into a semi-interesting account fit for a blog. Things have actually been happening, but not such things that make for funny or thought-provoking stories. Not even cute kid things that we've caught on tape. Just life stuff. Here's a summary:

Saw two concerts since my last post. One was Chris Isaak for free. He was really funny and entertaining. The music was good, but not the type that really moves me. It was at a smallish outdoor venue that allows people to bring food and alcohol, so it's always more about the ambiance than the acts, which usually cater to upper middle class, middle-aged folks. This Sunday we're seeing Keb Mo and Robert Cray there.

The other concert was Rush, this past Monday. It was great. I went with my older son's biological father, who is a Rush freak. The band sounded great, the crowd was large and very into it, and the guys played some great, unexpected tunes. The only bad part was the fact that I haven't heard their new album yet, so when they played songs from it, I couldn't air guitar/bass/drum like the familiar tunes. But a great show, nonetheless. A funny thing did happen: when buying a t-shirt, they were out of extra large of the style I wanted. The large looked big enough, so I bought it. It's not going to be big enough after washing, though. The funny part is, I did the same exact thing 5 years ago at a Rush show and haven't yet learned the lesson.

I don't think I've seen any movies since my last post, but I am about half-way through Half Blood Prince. I've kind of stalled because of studying for a test next month and another reason I'll get to later.

Regarding indoor soccer, it's over and went well. My team went 7-1. I even scored some goals. One game I had two goals that I felt very proud of. I'm not a great soccer player, not having really played it since high school on an intramural team. I stopped playing organized soccer in 6th grade. So there are a lot of skills that I don't have. But I think I have a pretty good sense for the game and I put a lot of effort in. I made plenty of mistakes but never cost my team a game or let in goals. I got along well with the guys on my team and thought that we were going to stay together for subsequent seasons. Well, the rest of the team decided to go on without me, registering as a team without even telling me. It was a pretty shitty move, in my book. I don't think leaving me off the team is going to make much of a difference. I'm pretty bitter about it, as you can tell. I think mostly one guy is responsible for the snub, but the other guys could have said something either to include me, or at least let me know what was going on. What really sucks is that a major reason I played was to meet people and make friends. Oh well, that plan failed. I'll probably sign up to play again, but not for the current season. I'm much too busy with something else:

We're finally moving!!!!!

Well, not actually. We put our house up for sale and are going to start looking at new ones soon. Whether and where we move is heavily dependent on selling our current house and what price we can get. The more equity we can get out of it, the better house we can buy. It's a tricky process, trying to sell your house without having a new one lined up, and not even knowing what you can afford until the sale is done on your own house. We'll see how it goes. In the meantime we're working a lot to make our house ready to show. We did a lot of painting. I learned how to remove baseboards, put them back on, and caulk over them. I love learning new handy skills. Now we have to clean up all our stuff and pack it away so the house doesn't look lived in. So we need to cram a bunch of crap in our garage (which is already full of crap) and keep things looking nice. There's also some yard work to be done, but nothing major.

It's pretty exciting, but my wife and I vacillate between optimism and despair that we're asking too much for our house and that it either won't sell or will sell for an amount that won't allow us to buy a house we really want. Yesterday I came home to find the sign in front the house. That was really weird to see, and still is. Now comes the self-esteem onslaught waiting for people to view it and make offers. I'll keep you all posted about it. That may be the only stuff I write here for a while.

So how are you all doing? Any major life changes happening? Any real estate victories/nightmares you'd like to share?

Monday Morning Treat

2007-07-16T09:11:00.000-06:00

Don't ask me how I found it, but please enjoy:

The Motorboat Prodigy

I've seen some movies recently. Liked "Ratatouille" okay. "Live Free or Die Hard" was a lot of fun, but easily one of the most ridiculous movies I've ever seen. And I really liked the new Harry Potter. I liked it better than the book, maybe. The book was slow moving. The movie really communicated the gravity of the story and set the tone for upcoming installments. While "Prisoner of Azkaban" is the best looking movie of the set, I thought the story and performances of this one were the best so far. It's inspired me to get off my butt and finally read The Half Blood Prince.

I've also found another exemption to the summer TV blackout: Man vs. Wild on The Discovery Channel. It's awesome!

Oh yeah, WTF?

2007-07-03T11:24:00.001-06:00

Have you seen the new Axe fragrance commercials? Here is a sampling of them on YouTube.

Aside from being ridiculous, not particularly funny, and terribly degrading, where the hell did they get the spelling of the famous porn theme?

Bom Chicka Wah Wah?!?!

First of all, "bom"?!?! Where the hell did that come from? Everyone knows it "bow". And if you're going to use onomatopoeia, then spell the words like you end up saying them, i.e. "wow" instead of "wah". I know the classic sound is made by a wah-wah pedal, but it's clearly "wow".

It's simple people. If you're uncertain about it, you can look these things up. It seems likely that they made up their own misspelled phrase so that they could copyright it. Which is just stupid, like the whole idea of Axe fragrances.

Oh, and don't forget, Axe is made and marketed by Unilever, the enlightened, sensitive people who came up with Dove's "Campaign for Real Beauty". Hypocritical much? Anything to make a buck, I guess.

Cool videos from our vacation

2007-06-29T14:53:00.000-06:00

That hand reaching down is my son's.

His name is Colt, and he was CLOSE!

Then he did a little trick for us.

Certainly, a highlight of the trip.

Month-long Brain Dump

2007-06-28T11:06:00.000-06:00

Over a month has passed and I haven't been inspired to say anything. I'm sure some of my readers have an RSS updater that lets them know when I post again, but others, I'm sure, just stopped checking. Oh well. Here are some things that happened over the last month that were of some interest, but not enough to write about at the time.

1. What I saw at an amusement park. I saw a guy, bald head, wife-beater T, lots of tattoos. He was with a woman and some kids. What you might call white-trash, but he seemed nice enough. He was joking around, was in a good mood. Not that unusual a site where I live, or anywhere, probably. Then I realized what the tattoo was that covered the back of his head:

A true skinhead neo-nazi, just chilling with his family at an amusement park on a sunny weekend. I know that there are lots of skinheads in America, and the White Supremacist movement is growing, but I was bowled over at how shameless this guy was displaying his tattooed head like that in a crowded, family place. Wow.

2. Indoor Soccer. I signed up to play indoor soccer a long time ago, like in the Fall, but there wasn't enough interest for the night I signed up for, so we never played. I got a call a couple weeks ago that they were making teams for the summer. I went to the first game, and everyone was a LOT better than me. I ended up switching to a different night's league that's allegedly a lower skill level. I guess it is, but everyone's still way better than me. It's also tiring as hell and works different muscles than running, so I'm sore in new, awkward places. But it's fun, and hopefully I'll get better and also meet some new people.

3. I went on vacation. Part of the reason I've been so silent lately is that I was on vacation with limited internet access, so I hadn't even been reading blogs. I went to my hometown and brought my family. While there are beaches in and around my hometown, and the weather was nice during the trip, we didn't do much beachgoing or swimming because the water was cold. We did do a lot of cool stuff, though, and I have two awesome videos from one of our activities that I will upload and post later. You can't wait.

4. Summer TV. I know, it's supposed to be the TV-free "Summer of S. Reed" and so far that's going okay, but I've made some exceptions to the TV blackout. First of all, since NBC is dumping the rest of the unaired "Studio 60" episodes, they're grandfathered in. And WTF?, the show is actually pretty compelling now! It's still a liberal gasbag account of improbably intelligent and witty characters working for an unfunny comedy sketch show while dealing with REALLY unlikely crises, but it's well acted and the current interlocking plotlines are pretty interesting.

Also earning a variance from the viewing restrictions is, of course, reruns of "Avatar: The Last Airbender" I haven't seen yet. I caught one with my DVR net the week before my vacation, and had two lined up to record while I was away. But, as you can guess, Nickelodeon screwed me again and changed their schedule! Motherfuckers! One of the episodes I've tried to record 5 times, and 4 times it was changed. The other time I had it, but my satellite receiver was acting weird when I tried to play it, so I thought it didn't record properly and I deleted it.

There are 2 new shows that have creeped past the integrity of my TV will power. One is my wife's fault: "So You Think You Can Dance". She was watching last week's recorded episode in the other room while I was studying, and I got sucked into watching some of it. Last night, after my wife said there was some good stuff on it, I planned to skim it. I skimmed, but it still took an hour, and I watched all the dances. Crap. The second show is one I wasn't planning to watch, but because I had read good things about it I set it to record for my wife. I decided to check that out last night, too, and Oh My God, is it good! It's "Creature Comforts", by Aardman, the animation studio that did the Wallace and Gromit cartoons. I was dying, it was so funny. I was trying desperately to contain my laughter so I didn't wake up my family. It's just audio of interviews they've done with humans, but put into their classic style of clay-mation of animals. It doesn't sound like a genius combination, but it works so well. Check it out, if you get the chance.

5. Work. Surprisingly, that's been kind of busy and engaging lately. But I try not to talk about it much here, so that's all I'll say.

So that's it, my last month in a nutshell. Maybe something will happen in the next month that will make me write again sooner. I guess we'll see. Stay tuned for the vacation videos, though!

What a triumphant way to return to blogging!

2007-06-28T09:38:00.000-06:00

In the words of Jack Black:

"Oh My God... I did it. I've done it, I fuckin' did it."

I won the Internet!

May I present:

Between Wei Wang, Plaintiff, and Joachim Poon, Defendant
INDEXED AS: Wang v. Poon
Vancouver Registry No. E060708
British Columbia Supreme Court Vancouver, British Columbia
JUDGES: Humphries J.
[2007] B.C.J. No. 271; 2007 BCSC 194; 2007 BC.C. LEXIS 308
DATE INFORMATION: November 27 - 30, and December 1, 12, 14 and 15, 2006. Judgment: February 9, 2007.
JUDGMENT DATE: February 9, 2007

Yes, it's Wang v. Poon. I win! One to nothing!

More later.

Dessert!

2007-05-21T15:39:00.001-06:00

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Robert Plant, circa 1969, as a thrash-metal-screaming baby.

Some more.

And Blake Lewis fever is taking hold. Here's my older son (nicely blinged) recreating Blake's unique beatboxing version of "You Give Love a Bad Name"... and forgetting the words.

Main Course - Weekend review

2007-05-21T14:56:00.000-06:00

Want to know how to make a grown man cry?

The boys soccer team I coached gave me a ball signed by all the players after our last game this weekend! I'm such a softie, I was already getting teary during my last pep talk about how much I loved coaching them. Then they brought this out. I didn't actually cry, but my words were definitely choked. They even gave me and my family two gift cards!

The game was a great one, too. Closely played, and tied late. We ended up winning when my son scored a goal on a cross from his teammate. They've made me so proud the last few weeks, actually showing me that they learned what I had taught them about passing and getting open. I'd love to do it again, but not sure if I will.

Now for what I watched:

TV - Still catching up on a lot of shows on the DVR. I watched the second to last Earl episode and loved it! I was a little slow on the Rudy uptake (duh!), but halfway through realized what they were doing. Hilarious!

Movies - Saw Spiderman 3, and I'm glad I did. Let's face it, it's an event movie. You almost have to. But I wasn't very impressed. Lots of awful dialog, corny and unsubtle imagery for Peter's dark side (when the reviews said emo, I didn't know they actually gave Spidey Pete Wentz's haircut), and lots of general silliness that didn't belong in the movie (Bruce Campbell's funny cameo and the "OMGWTF!!!11!" jazz club scene). The action sequences were good, and the scene of Sandman waking up after his transformation is Visual Effects Oscar-worthy (although I'm sure Transformers or Pirates will get it). The villains were okay, although their end was kind of abrupt. And Bryce Dallas Howard was pretty hot.

I also saw Breach, starring Ryan Phillippe, Chris Cooper, Laura Linney, and CAROLINE DHAVERNAS!! (Yes, Jaye from Wonderfalls! That was a pleasant surprise.) The movie was good. It had a constant, quiet suspense to it. I could barely find a time to open my Rollo candies, it was so quiet. Ryan Phillippe's performance was meh, but Chris Cooper again kicks ass. I don't know if his performance is believable from a true-story standpoint, but just from a movie perspective, his creepy paranoid villain is the highlight of the film. The most remarkable thing about the film though, was that there were at least 6 instances of blatant boom mic sightings. I understand that this may be due to an error of projection and not bad filmmaking, but it's very distracting and damaging to whatever dramatic mood the film is trying to set. I recommend the movie, though, if you're looking for a cheap diversion.

Dessert to come!

Appetizer

2007-05-21T14:19:00.000-06:00

Wow, I have several things to talk about today! Here's your first course.

Ladies, your wait is over! Now you can safely and naturally match your carpet to your drapes with:

Betty! (via Thighswideshut)

Wow, look at all those colors! And the testimonials are hilarious.

More to come.

Oh Yeah!

2007-05-17T23:32:00.000-06:00

You may be expecting me to lament the cancellation of Veronica Mars, but I've moved on from that tragedy (except for my desire that one of the other 4 networks pick it up the way CBS snagged JAG after NBC dumped it). No, tonight I'm going to praise the awesome Office season finale!

What a great episode. Creed's blog, hilarious. Jan's boob job, uproariously funny. The end during Pam's interview, amazing! I thought she was getting teary. I know I was. And the last bit with Ryan was an awesome topper. I've been enjoying the show all season, but I haven't cared about it and the characters as much as last season. Tonight changed that. And I loved Jim's dorky haircut, too.

Next week's two-hour-finale-a-thon is really going to mess with my DVRing. Looks like Fox will have to be videotaped from an antenna. It's the only channel that comes in well enough to record. After that, I'm really excited about my summer TV hiatus. It's going to be the Summer of S. Reed, baby! Reading, studying, running, working out, beach vacation. The possibilities are endless. Except for Avatar: The Last Airbender. I'm still going to try and watch reruns of episodes I've missed. Damn Nickelodeon has screwed me out of one particular episode 4 times! Bitches!

Lost and VM Update

2007-05-10T11:17:00.000-06:00

Last night's Lost? Off the freaking hizook!!!! Forgive my comically dated expression, but it kicked a whole lotta ass! Dharma and Ben back story, the Jacob "reveal", more questions raised, and a cliff-hanger shooting at the end? Gold. And there's more to come. There are frustrating things left open, but it's the good kind of frustrating. There are answers, but not the kind that resolve conflict, just make you more curious. Loved it.

And here's some good news about Veronica Mars: it WAS Lindsey McKeon as the radio station manager! I thought I recognized her. Who is she, you ask? Well, not that I watched it, but she was one of the stars of Saved by the Bell: The Next Class. And she was on a short-lived Fox show I liked called The Opposite Sex. Which also starred... Heroes' Milo Ventimiglia! Weird. Apparently she also had a recurring role on Guiding Light:

Man, that's some good acting!

Here's even better news for Veronica: The CW may renew it!! Looks like the direction they want to take the show next year is convincing the network to keep it, and I really like the idea except for one thing: What the hell are they going to do with Enrico Colantoni? He's such a huge part of the show, you can't ditch him, too. Logan, Dick, Piz and even Wallace I can deal with losing, but not Keith!

There's some good season finale stuff coming up before I swear off TV for the summer and do more reading. But I am checking out ABC's Traveler tonight. Hopefully it will be good and won't be a summer series.

I do watch other stuff beside Veronica Mars

2007-05-09T11:17:00.000-06:00

I guess I mostly write about it because it's the only show I watch the night it airs. Every other show I watch days later on DVR. Hopefully my writing about it will also contribute to the movement to save the show next season. If the show does get saved, though, they better bring it better than these last two episodes. This week's was better than last week's, but the absence of an over-arching mystery drains the show of a lot of gravity. Character drama just isn't doing it for me anymore (I'm writing you off, Grey's Anatomy, and your ridiculous doctors). Paul Rudd made the show. He was hilarious. AND they played some Idlewild during the show, too! Sweet!

In personal news, I've had a couple good longish runs recently that are very encouraging. Unfortunately, Sunday night after such a run, I almost certainly broke my little toe when I slammed it into a wall corner. It's healing faster than I thought it would, but I probably won't be running very soon. The toe is swollen and a very unattractive color, and I can't curl it without manual assistance. Damn.

In moving the hell out of our neighborhood news, there is no news. Our current plan is to move next Spring, but I recently spent some time looking at foreclosure properties in the area. Does anyone know anything about buying homes this way? Does it only work for investors with lots of cash, or can families do it, too? Because if we have to pay full price next Spring, we'll probably be moving to a similarly sized house in a similarly bad neighborhood. Or moving to West Bum Suburb. We'd like to avoid both of those.

Checking in

2007-05-02T09:14:00.000-06:00

Hey, I beat my two week deadline! Here are some recent happenings:

- Remember that syringe I found outside our house, well it gets worse. Over the weekend two guys broke into a house a couple blocks from our house and shot three people inside, one of which died, and a dog. Yeah, we need to move.

- Finally got the remaining Heavy Vegetable and Thingy CDs I ordered after Christmas, and they're great! I also picked up a new CD by a band called Other Men, who is Heavy Vegetable without their female vocalist. It's awesome, too. Rob Crow is a fucking genius!

- Hooray for the return of Veronica Mars last night! Too bad the episode was pretty lame. Patriotic, honorable Arab character was cliched and dated. Fake ID mystery was very limp (except for Keith kicking ass at the end). Pulp Fiction quoting was over-done, not clever. The most entertaining part was the Piz-Veronica-Logan stuff at the end. But I don't watch the show for love triangles. If it's just going to be a soap opera, then don't bother renewing it. And you can't blame it on the fact that these last episodes are stand-alone, without an ongoing mystery. Hopefully the next couple will be better. You don't want to go out like that.

- I still need to watch the finale of 30 Rock online. Can't wait. And if you like excessive swearing, stay tuned to see if NBC screws my DVR efforts again this Thursday with 40 minute episodes of The Office and My Name is Earl.

UPDATE:

OMFG, how did I forget to write about this? Go. See. Hot. Fuzz! It's absolutely hilarious! Saw it over the weekend, and even the wife liked it. I was rolling. The shootout near the end is filmdom's second greatest shootout scene, behind John Woo's The Killer. Funniest movie I've seen in a while.

Accumulated Miscellany

2007-04-25T09:39:00.000-06:00

I've been wanting to write things here over the last few weeks, but the combination of work and laziness has conspired to keep me from doing it. There were a couple of things I thought about writing about: TV, music, politics, but I guess I didn't care enough to actually write it down. Now, though, I've got somethings to write about. I present to you:

1. Something I'm proud of,
2. Something I'm not so proud of,
3. A meme, and
4. A music link

1. Something I'm proud of - Or, something of which I'm proud. I ran a 5K race this past weekend. I haven't been going to the gym much the past few weeks, and was feeling a bit sick the past week, so I was worried about how well I'd do. Since Omega ran a 5K under 25 minutes a few weeks ago I've had it in my mind that I'd like to do 25 minutes, too. Last Thursday I went to the gym and ran 3.1 miles on the treadmill in 26:20, and it was a bit tiring, so I was pessimistic about my chances. While doing some warm up running Saturday morning before the race, I was a bit short of breath. I was feeling even less confident, and was resigning myself to get 27:00. The race started, and I ran as fast as I could without burning myself out. To my surprise, I looked at my watch as I crossed the finish line and it said 24:11! Officially, my time was 24:09 (let the cyberstalking begin). My mile pace was 7:46. I was very pleasantly surprised, and now I'm going to make sure I run more and do some races this summer so I can do the marathon next year.

2. Not so proud - I watch American Idol. Every week. I pick favorites and root for them. Sometimes I even vote. But last night, fearing that my favorite contestant might be in danger, I voted a lot. Like 50 times. I voted for Blake. I've had favorites every year I watched, but this year is the only time I've thought I could be a fan of the contestant after the show was over. Blake is a beatboxer and fan of alternative music. He's cool, and has a very unique, marketable voice. He's sung songs by Keane, The Cure, and 311 this season. There's never been a contestant closer to my taste in music than he is. I'd probably prefer him in a band context rather than solo, and the quality of whatever he releases will depend greatly on who's writing and producing his songs, but I think I may buy his first album. I'll at least sample it on iTunes to give it a chance.

3. A meme - Scarlet offered to do a blog interview, and since I hadn't had anything to write about in a while, I accepted. Here are her questions and my responses:

1) Which child is your favorite? Haha, just kidding, please don't pick one. Give me the top 3 favorite characteristics for each.

Tough question, because I love so much about both of my boys. But here are some things I love about them:

Older boy - very smart and curious, funny as all get out, sensitive and sweet.

Younger boy - loves music and to dance, shows how much he loves me when he sees me, cute as hell.

2) What 3 albums do you listen to the most?

Hmm, I only listen to whole albums in my car, and I try to put in different stuff when I switch the changer, but these three have been in there a lot lately:

Hey Mercedes - Loses Control
.Moneen. - Theory of Harmonial Value
Thingy - To the Innocent

3) What is your favorite Hey Mercedes song and why?

"The Frowning of a Lifetime". It's high energy, has some great dissonances in some of the chords, and has great lyrics, both in what they are and how they fit in the song rhythmically. Bob Nanna is a genius at how he puts lyrics together and makes them work in the melodies.

4) What were you like in high school? Did you enjoy hs?

I was pretty much a nerd and associated with academic types. I liked sports but didn't play them on HS teams. Most of my friends were from the Key Club and Chess and Strategy Games Club. I wasn't "popular", but well known and liked, I think. I was shy with girls and didn't date. At all. I liked high school a lot, even though I didn't have a blast socially.

5) If you were offered $1 million to be in a porn, would you? What if it's with Ron Jeremy?

My wife would obviously have to be okay with it (and ideally she would be my costar), but to get rid of my student loans and buy a great house, I probably would do a standard, non-gay, non-fetish porn movie scene with a condom on, even with Ron Jeremy (as long as I don't have to touch him).

4. A music link - A local radio station plays mashups every afternoon. I know this because my wife told me, I rarely listen to FM music radio. I never got into the mashup craze, but my wife recommended one she heard, so I checked it out. It's by a DJ named Party Ben, and it's a cross between "Every Breath You Take" by The Police and "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol. He calls it "Every Car You Chase" by The Snow Police and it's pretty cool. You can find it on his homepage. Check out his other stuff here. I especially recommend his "Dontcha/Seether" mashup. The two songs fit together perfectly. I can't hear either song alone without mentally putting the other into it now.

That's all for now. See in a few weeks! (hopefully not, but who knows)

Oh no, he's going to start swearing again!

2007-04-06T13:59:00.000-06:00

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you NBC!!!! I don't care how much money you can make from iTunes, it makes NO SENSE to offer almost all your shows for free on your website, but NOT The Office!! You motherfucking douchebags!

You see, every now and then networks like to change things up a bit when it come to scheduling. This, unfortunately, wreaks havoc on my DVR system. Like when Nickelodeon decides to just change when they air Avatar: The Last Airbender and I end up recording Jimmy Fucking Neutron instead. The worst, though, is when networks (NBC is particularly guilty of this) decide to change the start time of a show by about 5 minutes. When the program info gets updated, any pre-set recording timers don't work because they're tied to a particular time, and not just the name of the program. So, as you may have guessed by now, my satellite system didn't record the much-anticipated return of The Office last night. Luckily my wife noticed that the record light wasn't on, but not until after half of the episode was over (including, no doubt, the face-off between Roy and Jim, which is what I've really been waiting to see). My wife recorded the remaining show, but I decided not to watch it because I thought I could watch it online like I do 30 Rock (btw, that show is fucking hilarious!). But it's not there! You have to buy it from iTunes because it's a top seller there, and the immense ad revenue NBC gets from the show is not enough for those greedy, Santorum-slurping, Apple reach-around-giving* motherfuckers!

Don't anyone fucking dare say anything in the comments about what happened. If anyone knows how I can watch it, please let me know.

Why do I watch so much TV when it only seems to make me angry?

* I guess I could have just called them Rusty Tromboners, but that doesn't have quite the same effect.

"I'll kill a snitch."

2007-03-25T08:10:00.000-06:00

I love the New England Patriots. I love the team, the players, the coaching staff, and the management. Because of this, I love Tom Brady. Despite all the press he gets, both negative and positive, I remain loyal to our awesome QB. Whatever team he goes up against, whomever the opposing QB, I know Tom has the skills to outplay them and win.

Despite my Tom adoration, I have a confession to make: Peyton Manning is BY FAR the superior Saturday Night Live host. I didn't watch all of last night's episode, but what I did watch was hilarious. Peyton was much more comfortable, competent, and just plain funny than Tom was on the show. Even the brilliance that was Tom as an office employee in tighty-whiteys could not overcome Peyton's overall performance. I sadly must acknowledge Peyton's supremacy in this field.

Go to Hell, Haters!

2007-03-21T23:50:00.000-06:00

Lost is the motherfucking balls! If you've been complaining about it, you're just lazy. Not every episode can be as awesome as tonight's, but no show hits it out of the park every week. It's still one hell of an intriguing, well-written show, so shut the fuck up!

There goes my potty mouth again.

P.S. - Apparently Blogger got wise and added "fuck" and its derivatives to its spell-check dictionary. Bravo!

Where have I been?

2007-03-21T14:10:00.000-06:00

Not that I've received any comments or emails expressing concern for my cyber-absence! Humph!

I've been busy and bored, distracted and uninspired. The weather here has been absolutely beautiful, and home life has been pretty busy with family birthdays. Everything else has been pretty uneventful. Here are the two most interesting things I have to write about:

1. I left work yesterday, and was driving in downtown, and saw a guy, about mid 50s, walking on the sidewalk wearing a very short yellow miniskirt and a purple blouse. He was walking very naturally, like nothing was unusual. I wanted to snap a pic with my phone, but didn't have time. Bummer.

2. Spike showed "The Boondock Saints" on Saturday night, presumably to commemorate St. Patrick's Day. I had never even heard of this movie until about 2 years ago. After reading a lot about it on blogs and message boards, I was excited to finally see it. Turns out that it's not a very good movie. It's pretty bad, actually. I don't think my reaction to it stems from Spike being required to bleep out the 1,235,736 times the word "fuck" is apparently used. It's just a choppy, poorly acted film that tries really hard to be cool. I was most shocked at how hammy Willem Dafoe was in it. He must cringe when he sees it now. I understand its appeal to youngsters who love violence and Irish accents, but I was not impressed. I actually turned it off early and watched "The Way of the Gun" which was more violent and more entertaining, though slower-paced and darker. I don't know why, but even though I know Ryan Philippe is a bad actor, I still like to watch him. It was written and directed by the guy who wrote "The Usual Suspects" and I recommend it if you haven't seen it.

Needle in the Hay

2007-03-09T15:46:00.000-07:00

I live in a heavy commercial area near a convenience store, so trash often blows into our yard. It's also not the greatest socio-economic area, so we get some "less than desirable" folks walking by our house, too. So I wasn't terribly surprised to find what a friendly neighborhood junkie left in our front yard. We should probably move.

I wasn't going to touch it, even with gloves. But there was no way I wasn't going to document it and post about it. Have a great weekend (with or without needles)!

"I Believe!"

2007-03-01T11:40:00.001-07:00

I couldn't think of a title, so I used the title of the R.E.M song that was on my iPod when I began the post. Turns out, it's quite an apt, though ironic, title for what I'm going to write below.

First of all, a couple trivial things on my mind.

1. Veronica Mars was great on Tuesday, except for the ending.

Spoiler alert - I'm going to (mostly) spoil it for you if you haven't seen it.

I suspected the real killer much earlier, but the show worked so hard to throw you off and create surprise at the end that it seemed a bit deus ex machina. Just all of a sudden, Bam! It all comes unraveled in a couple minutes. Veronica pieces it together, confronts the killer, and it's over. It was done clumsily, I thought. And it left one event totally unexplained: why did the Dean's wife ship her kids off to England, buy a boat, and go to Mexico?

2. I'm going through a bit of a confidence rough spot right now. One thing I've always believed and accepted is the maxim "There's always someone better than you." But when it seems that there are lots of people better than you. In fact, you're not at all good at what you thought you were good at, that can be tough to take. It makes you reflect on all the delusions you've fed yourself over the years.

3. I was going to stop there until I stumbled upon something online today. If you're a fan of logic, and especially the incredibly flawed application thereof, then read this argument for the truth of Christianity. I mean no offense to my Christian readers. I'm not arguing here that your faith is wrong or naive. My only point is that the people who wrote this "argument" are stupid. Basically it says that Christianity, as a religion, faced many crippling obstacles to its survival in ancient Mediterranean society. From there it concludes that it could only overcome these obstacles if the Resurrection were true. Here's the basic problematic syllogism:

1. If the Resurrection weren't true, Christianity as a religion would not have survived.
2. Christianity did survive.
3. Therefore, the Resurrection is true.

The bigger problem is the presumed truth of the first premise. According to the author, people would never face the overwhelming stigma of believing Jesus was God's resurrected son unless they had seen tangible proof, or heard from people who had that proof. Setting aside the issue of whether such tangible, non-circumstantial proof existed, it's not logically necessary that the faith ONLY could have survived with the existence of this proof. The disfavor in which Roman and Jewish society held Christianity lasted long after any of the evangelical witnesses had died. The spread of the faith would then have been in the hands of secondary, tertiary, (etc.) sources. "I know a guy, who has a brother, who once dated a woman, whose father heard Paul the Apostle speak and he said that Jesus really was resurrected." If the present-day proof was so essential to the earliest converts, why did it not matter to the second generation if the consequences of believing were equally harsh?

It is not logical to conclude that the hundreds or thousands of followers that Christ had before the Crucifixion would not have succeeded in spreading the faith without having been an eye witness to some evidence of the Resurrection. Many religions have spread without having the benefit of the "proof" of the Resurrection, including ones that are still with us today. Making the point that other religions thrived in more favorable conditions (as this article does) is not valid. Nearly all religions, at their birth, need to overcome skepticism and hostility with some appeal to proof. Ask any member of a religion if they think that their faith survived because of its truth, and they will say "Of course!"

The author makes other fallacious claims (like "the Gospels include phrases inviting people to investigate the truth for themselves, so it must be true!") but the one that really gets me is at the end:

Skeptics and critics must explain otherwise why, despite each and every one
of these factors, Christianity survived, and thrived.

Two responses:
A. Okay, because Jesus, with the help of a very small group of wealthy co-conspirators, faked his death and resurrection. They bribed the Roman soldiers guarding the tomb, broke him out and then it all carried on from there with his apostles spreading the resurrection story, eventually getting the ears of influential Romans and finally Emperor Galerius, and from there global dominance. Did it really happen that way? Who knows? Is it as likely as the "True Resurrection" theory? More so, from a strictly physical standpoint.

B. Um, no we don't. You're the one trying to spread your faith though rational means. You either need to prove it really did happen without relying on texts written by non eye-witnesses many years after the alleged fact (impossible at this point) or abandon the logic exercise and rely on humans' capacity for faith in a conception of the divine.

Again, I'm not trying to destroy anyone's faith. I'm not about tearing down the Bible. I still have a lot to learn about it, and am looking forward to doing that. I know from my own experience how mysterious and powerful faith is. You don't need insecure Christians formulating hackneyed, inferential arguments to "prove" events in the Bible to have faith. In fact, if you're a faithful person, you shouldn't want them.

Short Friday Post

2007-02-23T14:06:00.000-07:00

Good Office last night, especially the end in the bar. Who saw THAT coming? Wonder what's going to happen next week. Look out, Jim!

And here's the second coolest stop-motion movie I've seen on the internet. (The first coolest was two guys fighting, and I can't remember where I saw it, but it was hella cool.)

TV Update

2007-02-21T15:51:00.000-07:00

It's been really hard for me to watch all the shows I want since getting the gym membership. Good news is, we're getting some results from all the working out, but I don't like having to wait up to a week to watch an episode. So I'm going to devote this post to only two things: one short commentary and one topic I've never discussed here before.

1. Veronica Mars. Holy shit, was last night's ep good! They intertwined the two mysteries very well, and I loved the fact that both were complicated, serious cases instead of one Scooby Doo mystery of the week with the heavier, multi-episode arc in the background. Both were high-stakes and both were in the forefront. But the greatest thing about the episode was the end! I'm still shocked by it, and not sure how I feel about the development. I think two of my readers actually watch the show, and you've probably both seen the episode, but I'll refrain from talking about it for now in case you haven't seen it. Suffice to say, it was the biggest WOW moment of the season for me, even bigger than the fall finale!

2. I like cartoons. I'm not talking about The Simpsons, Family Guy, Adult Swim, etc. I'm talking kid channel cartoons. Having two young boys has exposed me to many an animated series, and I've become fans of several. I feel no shame for this because it's obvious that these shows aren't written only for kids. Watch SpongeBob or Fairly Odd Parents and you'll see that there are things in there that no kid could get. So yeah, I love SpongeBob, Odd Parents, Danny Phantom, Ben 10, Power Puff Girls, and Justice League (although I haven't seen JL Unlimited yet). I even have a little crush on Kim Possible. But one cartoon has become a true favorite, one that I watch whenever I can, and DVR old eps I've missed.

It's called Avatar: The Last Airbender and it's totally awesome. It's a very large scale, martial arts epic set in a mythical, Asian-influenced world. The world is comprised of 4 nations based on the 4 elements of nature: Air, Water, Earth, and Fire. Certain members of each nation can manipulate, or "bend", their nation's namesake element, meaning they can use it as a tool or weapon. There is an individual in the world who has mastered bending all of the elements, and whose job it is to maintain balance between the nations and the elements. This individual is called The Avatar, and is a spirit that is continuously recycled into a new body after the former one dies. The series starts with the Fire Nation (the bad guys) having waged war on the rest of the world for 100 years while the current incarnation of the Avatar is lost. He is discovered as a boy, frozen in the ice at the south pole. His name is Aang. He is the last surviving member of the Air Nation, 12 years old, and has to learn quickly how to master all the elements so he can stop the rampaging Fire Nation and save the world. He is accompanied by the two teen siblings who found him, members of the Water Tribe.

It's a fascinating series, with a very detailed and well-thought out backstory as well as a captivating plot going forward. It also has very well drawn and choreographed fight scenes that can get your adrenaline pumping like a Jet Li movie. I highly recommend it if you ever get the chance. It's on Nickelodeon, and is currently in reruns before season 3 starts. I presume that the creators plan on wrapping up the story in four seasons, one for each element, but I'm not sure. Whatever the plan, I hope that Nick keeps it on until they complete the story. It's so good, I care as much about its characters and the fate of their world as I do about the Lost survivors and Jack Bauer. For that, my wife likes to snicker at me. But check it out for yourself and you'll see.

Fuck You! Fuck You! Fuck You!

2007-02-15T10:11:00.000-07:00

The geniuses behind Blogger are really fucking stupid! Thanks, morons, for making me upgrade to the new damn Blogger. You've fucked everything up!

Hodge Podge

2007-02-14T11:42:00.000-07:00

First Item: Bruins 3 Oilers 0. On Chief Night, too! JuicyA is hating me today, I'm sure. Brad Bochenski has been on fire since the Bruins acquired him. He seems to have lit a spark under the asses of Patrice Bergeron and Marco Sturm, too. Now if only Savard, Murray and Axelsson pick it up, the Bruins MIGHT be able to make a playoff run. But that probably won't happen.

Second Item: I haven't been talking about TV much, so here's bit. "Heroes" is awesome. The return of "Lost" was great, with the bit of info about where the Others came from and how long they've been there. Not sure how I feel about Morris being nabbed to arm the nukes in "24". That's a bit too coincidental. I haven't seen this week's 2-hour ep, though, to see how it plays out. "The Office" returned to its buffoonery last week with Michael's wedding behavior again stretching the bounds of credulity, and not in a good/funny way. The funniest show of the week award (for last week) goes to "My Name is Earl". It seems like they wrote the show just to accommodate Jaime Pressly's pregnancy, but it was so chock-full of funny lines I had to pause it while I laughed so I didn't miss anything else.

Third Item: What the fuck is going on here?!?! Wow!

Fourth Item: The Police performance at the Grammys was pretty anticlimactic, but they're going on tour! Even if they come to my neck of the woods, though, I won't be paying hundreds of bucks to see them in a too-large venue. I'll wait to watch it on YouTube.

Awesome!

2007-02-08T12:04:00.000-07:00

Best "Post Secret" submission in a while.

What's up, Doc?

It says WHAT??!?!

2007-02-07T16:16:00.000-07:00

I know that the Bible is full of less-than pleasant things: plagues, wars, death, and even sex. That makes it a very compelling narrative, even disregarding the religious significance many people attach to it. That's why I love Slate's Blogging the Bible series, because I'm too lazy to read the actual Bible. But today I discovered something about the Bible that genuinely shocked me! It's in the Old Testament Book of Ezekiel, Chapter 23. During an extended metaphor likening Samaria and Jerusalem to exceedingly whorish sisters, God rips off these lines:

Men "fondled her virgin bosom and poured out their lust upon her"; "[men] whose members were like those of donkeys, and whose emission was like that of stallions."

Here's a less explicit translation:

8 Neither left she her whoredoms brought from Egypt: for in her youth they lay with her, and they bruised the breasts of her virginity, and poured their whoredom upon her.

20 For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses.

Wow! Ezekiel was one nasty mofo, who probably had some insecurity issues with both the size of his member and the volume of his splooge. Sure, it's metaphorical, but a metaphor is only as effective as the relative familiarity of what you're comparing to. To choose donkey dongs and super streams of horse jism as the ultimate tools of defiling women tells something about the author, in my book, and probably ancient Jewish society as a whole. Also, what does it say that the two women apparently liked it?

I never expected to read anything like THAT in the Bible.

2007 Super Bowl Commercial Awards

2007-02-07T15:31:00.000-07:00

I know I'm late doing this, but I've been a bit busy the last few days. Let's get to 'em!

Best: I had a hard time choosing the BEST. There were several I liked, but not one that really rose above all others. Some of my favorites were the Blockbuster Mouse, The Bud Light Ax Murderer, the Snickers Mechanics' Kiss, the Garmin metal-meets-Power Rangers ad, and the Taco Bell Lions pronouncing "carne asada". (I love when the one lion says "Ricardo Montalban?!"). Because of the recent over-reaction to the Snickers ad by gay and lesbian groups, I'm tempted to give the award to it. But because the ending is too silly (they could have executed it better, and probably avoided all the controversy in the process), I'm giving it to the Bud Light Ax Murderer.

Best Overall Campaign: CareerBuilder.com, and their Survivor-like ads.

Most Improved: Emerald Nuts, who thankfully abandoned their incredibly stupid acronym campaign and introduced a mischievous Robert Goulet. Good stuff.

Worst: There were several stinkers: SalesGenie was a lame shortened 80s infomercial, the American Heart Association's snuff film was confounding, and the Jay-Z virtual football commercial really bugged me (because I hate Jay-Z). But the award goes to General Motors and their laid-off robot ad. How oblivious to the plight of thousands of laid-off American auto workers can you get, when you show a robot, partially responsible for the loss of so many jobs, trying to make ends meet in demeaning jobs and finally taking its own life by jumping off a bridge? I was shocked that anyone green-lit that ad. They could have made the perfectionism point in a much better way.

Woo Hoo!!!

2007-01-30T11:25:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, now I have to watch the Grammys. Fortunately, it's just the beginning.

Two posts in one day?! You're shitting me!

2007-01-29T12:15:00.000-07:00

What else am I supposed to do while procrastinating on work that will make me money?

People who are familiar with my past blog life remember when I would post qualitative assessments of women and ask for feedback from the audience. I'm kind of bringing that back for a limited engagement. I was poking around on BostonBruins.com today and went to the "Ice Girls" section.

Ice Girls are a strange, questionably successful, feature added by several NHL teams over the past few years. Basically they are (hopefully) attractive women with ice skating ability acting as hockey cheerleaders. They superficially clean ice shavings during breaks in play, and do promotional stuff like shoot t-shirts into the crowd during intermissions. Hockey purists, I'm sure, would like to see all Ice Girls cross-checked into goal posts by Pee-Wee players for between-period entertainment. But they're good for something: subjective voting!

Here is the Boston Bruins Ice Girls page.

Since I'm too lazy to post pictures, names and profiles here, you'll have to follow the link and click through each girl to pick your favorites. Leave a comment about who you like the best. Include profile information in making your choices, not just the picture. Let's get a well-rounded Miss Bruin Ice Girl 2007.

I will not be sharing my selection, as I have not made one. It's the only decent thing a married man can do. But see if you can spot my long-lost, much younger twin sister among them. The similarities between us are shocking, even considering a couple gender-centric differences in movie and music taste.

The Slender Reed's Sundance Review 2007

2007-01-29T11:28:00.000-07:00

I figured that since I was lacking blogging material, I should take advantage of my unique geographical situation and post about the Sundance Film Festival. Since tickets to all the big movies were sold out (even though I paid $5 for "early" online ticket buying) we only got to see a Shorts program and a movie called The Nines. But here's my take on the slice of Sundance I was able to see.

Shorts - There were 6 short films in this program: Sophie, Pop Foul, Windowbreaker, The Dawn Chorus, William, and Hard to Swallow. They were all interesting. Sophie and William especially were head scratchers. The Dawn Chorus had a really unique premise, was funny and a little sad, but Hard to Swallow was the run-away winner of this group. Hilariously funny and raunchy. If you get a chance to see it, do.

The Nines - This is a very interesting film in it's structure and story development. As you can see from the review at the bottom of the IMDB page linked above, it's kind of a head-turner. John August, the writer-director, has an eclectic writing pedigree. He's written for Tim Burton, a cartoon feature, the Charlie's Angels movies, and Go (a Doug Liman film I loved). The movie stars Ryan Reynolds, of "Two Guys and Girl" and "Van Wilder" fame. He's known as a comic actor, and he's very funny, but hopefully he'll totally sell Hollywood on his dramatic chops in this film. (I don't think The Amityville Horror and Blade: Trinity are going to cut it in that regard.) He's awesome in the movie, showing great range in the space of one movie. Hope Davis, one of those "I've seen her in a bunch of stuff but never really noticed her" is equally great. I've liked her in several movies over the years (still haven't seen American Splendor, though) and was glad to see her showcased in this film. Melissa McCarthy, the spunky Gilmore Girls regular, is likeable but didn't impress me much.

Now for the plot. The film jumps in the middle of events and you don't know what's really going on, or where things are leading, until the end. The story and structure do a great job of entertaining and intriguing you until you are very anxious to know what the ultimate explanation is going to be. There are a few "what the ?" moments that don't really add to the mystery that are a bit of a distraction. When the movie finally comes to the climax, though, the "reveal" is very unsatisfying, in my opinion. I found myself picking apart all that had come before for inconsistencies the way everyone tried to pick apart The Sixth Sense after the big twist. Don't worry, there are no ghosts. But I felt the premise and plot were driving toward something more surprising, interesting, and original. It's one slip by the filmmaker, but it's a pretty damn big one. Still, I recommend seeing it if it makes it to wide release. It's a very well shot and acted film, and certainly pulls you in. And BTW, if my body looks like Ryan Reynolds' in a year or two, then all the money we spent on the gym membership will be totally worth it.

There were like 10 other films we wanted to see over The Nines (not the Dakota Fanning rape one) but were sold out. I'll be curious to see if those get picked up and released nationwide. Still, I was glad to have seen The Nines. Even though tickets were $15 each.

You'll never guess what I've been doing today

2007-01-24T15:09:00.000-07:00

Go on, guess. Nope, not that. It has to do with music. Close. Give up? I've been listening to Japanese rock bands! I like to poke around Slate everyday, and came upon this interesting article today. It talks about songs by foreign artists you can't buy from iTunes here in the States, and it highlights several Japanese bands. The article praises the Japanese rock scene, favorably comparing bands to well-known English and American acts. Well, I thought I'd check it out, and this is what I found:
1. They're all terribly derivative of American and English bands; and
2. It's hard to listen to rock in a foreign language and get into it.

I don't mean those findings to sound so negative. I heard lots of good music, but not my next great discovery (Rob Crow-led bands is my current one). One band that did impress me, though, is Straightener. These kids write some really good songs. Sure, you could name maybe 12 bands from the last 10 years whose sound they've borrowed from, but it works. They also make some pretty neat videos. Here's a YouTube page with several of their music videos and some concert footage. Check them out! (Especially you, Scarlet and JaG. Oh, and you two should check out a Scottish band called The Fratellis, if you haven't already.) And make sure you watch the video for "Berserker Tune". It's not on that page, but it should come up in the "Related Videos" list for other songs of theirs. It's a really cool video.

As for TV, I haven't been watching that much. I've got quite a DVR backlog since we started working out at nights. Last week's Office and 30 Rock were awesome. I suspect both Ed Helms' and Rashida Jones' characters will be leaving soon from the Scranton Office of Dunder Mifflin. I was able to sneak in Scrubs and 30 Rock because ABC rebroadcast Grey's on Friday. Except my local affiliate pre-empted that with some Billy Graham show, so we missed Grey's altogether! I'm going to try to watch it online, or download it from iTunes. Bummer. Loved the return of Heroes. Eagerly awaiting Lost (did you hear ABC and the producers are talking about setting an end date? That's good news, meaning they can lock down the plot and get things moving.) Haven't watched this week's 24, so don't say anything yet.

As for working out, it's going well. Last week, when I wrote about the Gym Douche of the Week, I totally forgot about who SHOULD have been given that title. Once you hear the story, I'm sure you'll understand how I blocked it from my mind:

I use the locker room at the gym, but only to store my things in a locker. I don't change, I don't shower. If only more men followed this practice. I routinely see naked men wandering around the locker room. Not scurrying for a towel, or quickly putting clothing on. They're just walking around, in no hurry to do anything. (Sadly, according to my wife, there's no similar activities happening in the women's locker room. Thanks for bursting that bubble, Sweetie.)

Most of these guys are a bit older and not in great shape, although I'm not saying it would be better if they were young studs. I mean by that comment that I'm guessing it's some sort of generational thing. The gym is not a means to an end for them, it's a hang out. They don't come to get buff. They have no qualms about standing around naked while having conversations. Maybe they're all gay and treating 24 Hour Fitness like a bath house, but I don't have enough evidence to support that hypothesis. As uncomfortable as this behavior makes me, it does not rise to the level of Douchocity. But one among them has elevated the practice of Douching to an unimaginable height. I walked into the locker room to see a naked man in his 50s drying himself. But he wasn't drying himself with a towel. He was using the hand-blower. Not for his hands, not for his arms, not for his face, not for his chest.

He was drying his taint.

Yes, his motherfucking grundle!! He had his foot raised on top of the blower, directing the air flow betwixt his legs. I rushed past to find a locker, and when I was leaving to go work out, he had switched legs, apparently so that the other, still wet side of his unmentionable connective tissue could be dried. What the hell is wrong with this guy?!?! Even if he only did it in the privacy of his own home, he's got issues I don't want to know about. But here he is, publicly airing out his naughty business (right by the entrance, mind you) for all to see. I don't know that this guy could be topped in the Douchebaggery department. I'll try to keep my eyes out for other candidates, but that would require opening them. ::shudder::

Uh oh, here comes some more cussin'

2007-01-21T20:34:00.000-07:00

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccckkkkk!!!!!!

The Patriots HAD IT! 21-6 at the half! The defense got too soft. Peyton Manning and the Colts' offense is potent, but did the D have to allow two touchdowns early in the 3rd quarter? I shouldn't complain. Both teams played well, and it was a close game. Fucking penalties at the end sealed the Patriots' doom. Not only the lame-ass roughing the passer penalty they called that put the ball halfway to the goal line, but also the Pats' 12-men in the huddle penalty on the possession right before the Colts took the lead. They'd have had a first down if they didn't have so far to go. That was just stupid. But it's how it happened, and it was a good season with virtually an all new receiving corps and a beat-up secondary. But motherfucking dammit, I'm still pissed they lost. It doesn't matter how much they've won recently. If you're a fan, you want them to win the Superbowl every year.

I guess I'll root for the Colts to win it all. I fucking hate the Bears.

Pardon my recent profanity

2007-01-18T12:56:00.000-07:00

I'll try not to swear too much today. That last post just needed a lot of emphasis. I haven't watched much TV this week except for 24, so I've got nothing new to report there. Apparently the Idol auditions are quite disturbing. I don't get into this phase of the show, but I have them recorded. I'll check some out this weekend.

What I'd like to talk about a bit today is football. Yes, I'm a big Patriots fan, and I was ecstatic about their come-from-behind win over the Chargers last weekend. Now I'm equally anxious about the meeting with the Colts in Indy. But I don't want to talk much about those games. What I want to show you is the work of BradyFan83. Check out this guy's videos on YouTube. They're hilarious. Especially the one called "Brady". It's a homoerotic tribute to Tom Brady, to the tune of Kenny Rogers' "Lady". Enjoy.

I'm having difficulty casting my Gym Douche of the Week. Maybe I need to pay more attention. So this week I'll nominate my personal trainer. He's been overworking both my wife and me to the point of vomitous exhaustion and repeated inability to use crucial limbs. And then he tries to sell us more sessions because they are the only way to reach our goals. Thanks but no thanks, Biff. He's actually not a bad guy, but I'm glad my sessions are over. My wife, however, is graduating to hour-long sessions from half-hour sessions. Please pray for her.

OMFG!

2007-01-17T00:26:00.000-07:00

Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God! Oh, My Fucking God!

Yeah, the new season of "24" is pretty good so far.

Wow! Look at these cobwebs!

2007-01-12T11:36:00.000-07:00

I've been away from/avoiding this blog for a couple weeks now. Sorry, but the holidays, family, work, and apathy have been keeping me away. I suppose part of my lack of inspiration has been the fact that I can't write about too much going on in my life for fear of this place being found. Also, there's the fact that not much has been happening. Events have transpired, though, so here's a short recap:

- Despite my best (to date) efforts, my wife once again out-gifted me this Christmas, giving me two shows on DVD (Arrested Development, all 3 seasons and Veronica Mars, seasons 1 & 2) and a season ski pass, among other things I'm forgetting right now.

- We joined a gym! It wasn't a New Years resolution, it just happened to coincide with the new year. We actually bought a pre-paid, three year membership with personal training sessions. We're going to be serious about fitness and getting hot. So far so good, although we're a bit sore. I thought about doing a "Gym Douche of the Week" feature on the blog, but so far I've only seen two semi-ridiculous people. They weren't very offensive or funny, so I'm not sure how that's going to work out. Heh heh. Get it? "Work out"?

- As I am wont to do after birthdays and Christmas, I buy stuff I really want that is too hard for people to know I want. Here's what I got:

The new Foo Fighters live CD
The new Tanya Donelly "live" CD
2 CDs by Heavy Vegetable
3 CDs by Thingy
1 CD by The Ladies
1 CD by Pond
1 CD by Band of Horses
Paul Simon's "Rhythm of the Saints" album, from iTunes
"The Fear You Won't Fall" by Joshua Radin, from iTunes
"Angels of the Silences" by Counting Crows, from iTunes
15 non-live, non-album tracks from "Message in a Box", The Police Box Set, from iTunes
A 2007 Boston Bruins wall calendar
A 2007 VH1 Pop Fact of the Day desk calendar, which is pathetically inadequate compared to last year's Entertainment Weekly Great American Pop Culture Quiz desk calendar
2 new Doonesbury books (one was a sneaky gift from another blogger)
Volume #11 of Robert Jordan's interminable fantasy series "The Wheel of Time"
An out-of-print book from my childhood that takes place in my hometown (!!!)

I think that's it. Good stuff.

- I hope to be posting semi-regularly again. Although about what, I'm not sure. Maybe TV stuff. Last night's episode of 'The Office' was great. It was really funny without being too much. But the end was the best because I actually wanted to shout at the screen out of frustration. So as not to spoil it for anyone, I won't get into details. It was a good frustration because you realize how much you care about what's happening, and how you hope for a resolution soon.

- When I started this blog I mentioned that I may get a bit racy from time to time. So far I haven't followed through on that. But hopefully I'll have something to post along those lines soon. In the meantime, here's a racy picture of hot, though something's a little weird about her, Sofia Vergara from the new 'Knights of Prosperity' show, which is pretty funny. Not "making up for the fact that I can't watch '30 Rock' anymore" funny, but pretty good.

UPDATE: I just found something both racy AND hilarious! Check out Star Wars porn! Lucas just can't stop tinkering with these films, can he?

Merry Christmas to ME!

2006-12-21T23:39:00.000-07:00

Posting's light this week since there are no new shows on. But I got one hell of a TV present last night.

I love The Daily Show and Colbert Report, but don't get to watch them very often. For some reason, I recorded them last night and was treated to a smorgasbord of hilarity that was:

Stephen Colbert's Rock and Awe: Countdown to Guitarmageddon!!!

Holy crap was it funny! I thought Colbert's "Pop Culture, it's Crumbelievable!" show was good, but last night's blew it out of the water in scope, ambition, and execution. I never heard about the ongoing "feud" between Stephen and The Decemberists, but it came to a laugh out loud conclusion with the help of several celebrity guests including Rick Nielsen (of Cheap Trick fame) and Peter Frampton, Elliot Spitzer (yes, the soon to be Governor of New York), and Henry Fucking Kissinger!!!

My only complaint was that the guitarist for the Decemberists, Chris Funk, did a really lame guitar solo. Not that he's a shredder by trade, but it helps to use minor scales, dude. Go back to rock school with Yo La Tengo.

If you have the time and bandwith, find the episode online. Brilliant!

Must be a higher power at work

2006-12-18T15:19:00.000-07:00

You know that fate, the stars, or the Gods of Blogging are looking at for you when they lead you to an article about adult male circumcision containing a quote from an expert named Dr. Kevin de Cock.

It can't just be an accident! But even considering the benefits of such a procedure, that's not really something I want to think about these days, given my recent work down there. Ouch!

As far as the rest of my life, things are good. Getting ready for the big holiday, if not entirely in the spirit of it all. But I'm no Scrooge. I enjoy it, but I'm not feeling overwhelmed. The real excitement will be when I see my boys open their presents on Christmas morning, and when I do all my gift certificate shopping the week after! Whoohoo!

OK, I'll give some props

2006-12-14T22:18:00.000-07:00

Tonight's Office was great! Michael's "ho" monologue was hilarious. Marking the waitress' arm was classic. Oscar's cameo was a nice touch. And Pam still breaks/melts my heart.

Let's hope they keep it up.

And leave a comment about who you think Michael was on the phone with at the end. If you don't want any spoiler-ish info, then don't read the comments. :-)

Assorted Crap

2006-12-12T11:57:00.000-07:00

1. You know those Duracell commercials where they say something like, "If you think it doesn't matter what battery you're using, think about Bon Jovi, who only uses Duracell in his wireless mics. If it's that important to Jon, then shouldn't you use Duracell in your flashlight?" Anyway, I heard a radio commercial yesterday along the lines of, "If you think it doesn't matter what battery you're using, think about the North Pole, where Santa only uses Duracell in all those toys so that they work on Christmas morning." WTF? I understand keeping up the Santa Conceit. Quite honestly, as a parent, I support it. [Which makes the Brady Bunch's almost overt rejection of Santa Claus in the episode when Carol loses her voice before the big church performance all the more disappointing. I mean, most 80s sitcoms I saw as a kid had episodes that made it seem like Santa was real, but not the pure, idealistic Bradys. That's about the only chip in the monolith of my childhood development that was The Brady Bunch. Sigh.] Anyway, what irks me is how does a corporation score the Santa endorsement? Coca Cola has shown Santa swigging a Coke for years, and now Duracell is claiming that He only puts Duracell into electronic toys (which, presumably, his elves make under a license agreement from Tiger and various other Japanese companies). But what happens when a kid hears the ad, opens his robot dog on Christmas morning, and it's got Energizer batteries in it? What's to stop Rayovac from making a TV ad showing Santa putting their batteries in Rudolph's snout before taking off? Are there any boundaries to using Santa as a shill for your products? Can direct competitors both do it, or is there some kind of First-Come, First-Exploit rule in place?

Just something I was thinking about.

2. I don't listen to a lot of artists, but I can get kind of obsessive about the artists I do like. I made a CD of one such band's hard-to-get first album and a bunch of B-side songs, which I found on a now defunct file-sharing service. But yesterday I did some research and found out that the band has TWENTY NINE!!! more B-sides available out there in the world, most likely in UK used record stores. How am I supposed to complete my collection? It's not at all fair! Why not just put these songs on the albums, or better yet, release a double album of unreleased tracks like Pearl Jam's "Lost Dogs" CD? Do a fan a solid, guys!

3. I'm a New England Patriots fan, and man did they suck ass on Sunday! I know that the Dolphins have a good defense, but come on! Make some passes, Tom! You can't just blame losing your favorite receivers in the off-season any more. And not having Maroney isn't an excuse, either. It's so frustrating seeing the offense sputter most of the time when you see flashes of how well it can work. Lock it up, Patriots!

4. Recovering from a vasectomy is more unsightly, painful, and slow-going than you'd think. Ouch!

Seems pretty meta, doesn't it?

2006-12-07T13:26:00.000-07:00

How's this for a dilemma?

Reading a blog that makes you want to burst out laughing, but trying to hold it in so that your coworker who knows you write a blog , but doesn't know you know she knows, won't hear you and then know you're reading a blog and not working.

Anyway, for some really stupid reason I never checked out the new site made by one of my favorite bloggers when he moved abroad. Now I'm reading all of the archives and laughing myself silly. If you haven't been reading the Kiwi adventures of the blogger formerly known as Moobert, then you're totally missing out.

Much love to all the blogs I read, but Moobert and Mil Millington of "Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About" fame are the things online that have made me laugh like that. Oh, and cameltoe.org the first time I found it.

Making up for my neglectful behavior

2006-12-05T11:07:00.000-07:00

If this is going to turn into a TV blog, then I have to give some time and love to this season's awesomest new show: Heroes!

It's awesome. Last night's Fall Finale was really good, although the Hero that dies wasn't that big of a deal. It was shocking and sad, but not as much as they tried to build up. Sorry if I semi-spoiled anything for you. Plenty of questions left up in the air for January, and to stretch over the season, and that's fine. The nature of Claire's father and his job, and who's giving the "marching orders" is my biggest question.

So all of that said, I'd like to segue into a discussion of Lost. There's a lot of hating on that show lately, hating which began last season. The show's too slow. They don't give enough answers. Things get brought up for no reason and go nowhere (Hey, look, there are some Tailies! Now they're all dead!). I'm not inclined to buy all of these criticisms, but I'm not a fanboy that will blindly defend the show, either. I was forced to reflect on my feelings for the show when I stumbled upon this interesting article today: IGN's Top 50 Loose Ends on Lost. It's a good, thorough article (although they've overlooked one point about the two islands and the polar bears: if the cages where Sawyer and Kate are being held are for the polar bears and are on a different island, how'd the bears get to the main island? That's may be a continuity problem the writers can't resolve without a ridiculous, after-thought explanation). Anyway, the article is not overly critical, but it does provoke thought.

What I got out of the article is: Holy crap, there legitimately ARE at least 50 things introduced on the show that need further explanation! I'm a pretty devoted Lost fan. I watch the episodes closely. I followed along with The Lost Experience over the summer pretty regularly (although I didn't participate to the level of some nutso wack-jobs out there. Get a LIFE, people!) I feel I know what's going on and have my desires for discovering what's going to happen. But the show is so intricate, there are several things I've missed or forgotten about. And reading over that list of 50 loose ends, it's obvious the show will not have time to resolve all of them. Either the producers will have to let them drop to introduce new story lines, or they'll get bogged down trying to explain them all and get cancelled.

Frankly, it seems that the Lost team are trying to do too much. Maybe they don't care about the explanations for things like the Black Rock ship, or the cable leading from the ocean to the inner island, and feel that they just add spooky atmosphere. But real fans of the show do care, and will want to know the story behind such strange things. Even if those things are throw-away items, the plotlines that do matter are still complex without the extra stuff, and mysteries abound on several fronts. So you've got two sources of frustration: from the ardent fans when not enough explication of details in the background/ mythology of the island is given, and from the more casual fan when no storyline is satisfyingly resolved to allow for characters to move on.

The creators of Lost are asking for a lot of patience and attention from its audience, and it's starting to seem that the wonderful world they created didn't have enough boundaries at the outset. Like our Administration and its adventure in Iraq, they needed to have a clear understanding of the scope of how the story would play out before starting, and have an exit plan for when it would end. And that ending has to be on their own terms, not on someone else's. They should have it scripted already. And maybe they do, but so far it seems that the way they are getting there is a bit masturbatory. Anyone who ever read any of Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series of fantasy novels knows what I'm talking about. Sadly, I am one of those people, and I hope to begin reading Volume 11 this winter. *sigh*

Having laid out my own criticisms of the show, I still love it and have faith that it will intrigue and entertain. But counting on the endurance and optimism/naivety of devotee's like me who have nothing better to do with their lives is a dangerous thing to do in the network TV world. You won't last long on that fanbase.

P.S. - I just proofread this post and man, is it rambling! Sorry, but I don't have time to rewrite it.

P.P.S. - If you're looking for talk of last week's Office episode: I didn't like it. "Prison Mike", and just about everything else except Ed Helms, fell flat. Pretty disappointing.

HOLY SHIT!!!!

2006-11-28T22:57:00.000-07:00

Tonight's Veronica Mars episode was SO FUCKING GOOD!!! But as I was wondering what will happen next and when, I remembered that The CW only ordered about half the episodes this year, a provisional season. So tonight was set up as a sort of series finale, but with one mystery at the end to develop if it got picked up for the rest of the season.

But I don't know if it got picked up!!!! I need to know!!!

Man, what a good episode!

Stop the Pity Party

2006-11-28T12:52:00.000-07:00

So here I was, sitting at my desk bemoaning all the things going wrong. Things not working out the way I want them to, not being able to do things I want, and people not emailing me back. Then I thought about one of my best friends. She emailed me last February, and I still haven't emailed her back. What an ass I am! What's my problem? Is it THAT hard to send a note back saying that it was great to hear from her, things in my life are going well, and that I'll talk to her soon? What's so difficult about that? So I need to snap out of feeling sorry for myself. Life is good. Not ideal, but good. I should also email that friend. Maybe I will.

That was how I was feeling a half hour ago, before I heard about what could be an amazing real estate opportunity for me and my family (no we're not going to a time-share seminar). That has me all jacked up now and excited. Of course, it won't actually happen. Then we'll be slightly depressed having got over-excited about it. But we'll soldier on until we really can afford to move to a better home in a better neighborhood.

So the overall point to this post is supposed to be positive. About remaining positive in the face of minor setbacks and trivial disappointments. That's what I'm going to do. And TV will help me, as long as not EVERY show I watch goes on hiatus until January/February. What's with that? I don't remember every show having a "Fall Finale" before. Maybe I can get some reading done during the next two months, instead.

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all!

2006-11-22T12:58:00.000-07:00

We all know the drill. We eat WAY too much and regret it. Until it's time for pie, then we have one slice of each of the three kinds there. But in an effort to help curb your appetite, I'm sending you to this incredible video of a foot-long centipede catching and eating a flying bat! No shit, that's what it is. Check it out.

Now, about Veronica Mars. Did they just solve the season long mystery last night, or what? I'm sure there's still a rapist to find, but they kind of implied that they were all faked by the feminists. But next week's looks intense, so we'll see (someone dies!). And poor Logan. I kind of feel for him.

Happy Turkey Day. Get some relaxing in.

This Week's TV Post, About Last Week's Shows

2006-11-20T12:54:00.000-07:00

Life is so busy that we don't get around to watching most shows until several days after they air. This makes up-to-date commenting hard, but I know you all like my analysis so much you're willing to wait. So here goes:

Desperate Housewives - Good. I like the mystery this season, but not much else is blowing me away. Although the scene in the new neighbor's house was pretty creepy.

Heroes - Awesome. I guess Horn Rimmed Glasses guy is good, but maybe not with the same agenda as the rest of the heroes. Can't wait to see what happens with Hiro and the waitress. And does the Indian professor dude have powers, too? Is that what the dreams are about, or were they being sent to him by that kid?

Studio 60 - I'm hanging on, tenuously. I like Matt Perry and Brad Whitford a lot. Mark McKinney of Kids in the Hall and SNL fame is writing now, hopefully to make the sketch show parts funnier. The news read through last week was awful, and not just because Simon's replacement was flubbing the lines. And the commercials for next week are trying to trick us that Matt and his Fundie ex kiss, but it's obviously the British writer chick that kisses him. Isn't she from the original The Office?

Veronica Mars - Awesome! But why is Veronica sweating Logan so much? Lay off, honey. You're not so perfect yourself.

Medium's back! Too bad I haven't watched it yet, so don't say anything about it.

My Name is Earl - Awesome. Good to see Christian Slater working and being funny. That's what he's good at. His Jack Nicholson-esque star turn in "Heathers" was funny. It didn't mean that he could do drama, so he shouldn't. He needs some Paul Rudd type roles in comedies, supporting (and stealing scenes from) comic stars.

The Office - Really good first half. Ed Helms was great, and Creed ogling the breast-feeding woman was hilarious. But by the time Michael and Dwight were trying to push the big guy onto the table, the show started going too far again, like it's been doing a lot this season (beginning with Michael and Oscar's kiss). And not too far in terms of offensiveness, but too far in terms of plausibility. I hope they reign in the urge to be outrageous. You can have funny, awkward situations without going overboard. The Jim and Pam story line was good, but I think they put Jim and the other Stamford girl together too soon. Since when are they dating? They should have let the tension build a bit more with Pam seeing things develop between them.

30 Rock - REALLY good! Funnier than The Office. That's right! It was! You could tell they've added some things to spice it up: putting racier elements in it, using self-aware advertising humor (the Snapple bits). And yes, those things were derivative. They stole the clueless sexuality stuff from "Arrested Development" and the ad stuff from "Wayne's World". But it worked, and it was funny. Alec Baldwin rules that show.

Grey's Anatomy - Good stuff. I'm hooked, I'll admit. It's sentimental, but it gets to me. I'm sure that its story lines will go too far soon, like "ER", but I like the focus on the characters and their humanity.

Maybe this week I'll have more contemporaneous posts. But there's still last week's "Medium" and about 3 weeks of "Numbers" to watch. And some Food Network shows my wife recorded.

Probably a foolish cross-post, but It's ON, Bitch!!

2006-11-14T14:37:00.000-07:00

I finally got a response email from the producers of VH1's World Series of Pop Culture. I may have mentioned this before, but I'd love to make a blogger-based team to get on the show and clean up! I know some of you are pop-culture fiends like me (even more so, I'm sure) and would make great teammates.

There's a slight problem with getting on the show, though. The team needs to go to a casting call in one of 5 cities. After the casting interview (where they presumably pick people based on personality and not sheer knowledge), you get called back to qualify. If you make it to the final 16, then you go to New York for the taping in March. So you see, there will be a significant travel/time commitment to it. But the prize is $250,000 and ultimate bragging rights. Casting calls will be in the following cities on the dates specified:

New York City: January 19th - 21st
Los Angeles: January 26th - 28th
Chicago: February 2nd - 4th
Austin: February 9th - 11th
Orlando: February 16th - 18th

You can only go with an appointment, so the team has to be signed up and invited first. Taping of the actual World Series is from March 22-24.

Since I've just made this information available to all of you, there's nothing stopping you from stealing my idea and running away with it without me. But you wouldn't do that, right? Here's what I propose:

I'll be the team captain,
I've got a great name already, but it's negotiable if someone can come up with a better one,
Express interest only if you really want to do it, and can actually make it to a casting and taping,
If more than two other people want in, then we come up with some kind of quiz to see who gets in (from which I will be exempt, hehe)
If we have 6 or more total people interested, we make 2 teams that sign up for two different castings.

Well, what do you say? I'd like to sign up before the end of November to make sure we get a spot in a casting. Once we have a team we'll have to pick the casting that's most convenient for schedules and travel. Leave a comment or email me if you want in.

It's all a Blur to me

2006-11-10T08:39:00.000-07:00

Thanks for the guesses on my last post title. The inspiration for the title was Blur's "Coffee and TV". I was never much of a Blur fan, but this is a good song with a great video. Check it out.

And speaking of music (kind of) I'm soliciting recommendations for good unheralded music. What are you listening to that other people probably haven't heard of, but should?

Happy Friday and Good Weekend to you all!

Give me Politics and TV

2006-11-08T11:59:00.000-07:00

Politics
I wasn't much of a campaigner this year, but I'm pretty pleased and impressed with the shift that happened in both houses of Congress. Even if Webb ends up losing to Allen in Virginia, it's a significant change in the Senate. But the Democrats need to be careful. Keep your noses clean. Work hard for change, but recognize that you could cause gridlock with overzealous legislation that will get vetoed again and again. Don't forget, some of the new Dem members are relatively conservative or former Republicans. And then there's the mystery that is Joe Lieberman.

Be constructive. Don't continue harping on Republicans and how bad they are. Just do the job and forget about the soundbite. You've got to face the criticism that you only complain and reject things, but don't have any ideas or plans of your own. Prove that stuff wrong.

One more thing, did you see what Nevada did on their ballots? They took a page out of Montgomery Brewster's playbook and had a "None of the Above" slot for the Senate and Governor races. That's awesome.

TV
I'm a bit behind on show watching this week, but I caught Veronica Mars last night, and it was awesome! I've read some hating going on about the new season, that it's not good like the first season. I haven't seen the first season, so I don't really know, but I hope last night's ep set some of those critics to rest. Neat weekly mystery with good twist, cool new development in the season-long mystery, and great side character story lines with Keith and Wallace. Mya and Elliott back together again!!!

Still need to watch this week's Heroes, so no spoilers, please. And Lost is going to be good, but they're doing the damn Fall Finale thing and going on hiatus until February?!?! That's hella lame! Prisonbreak caught a lot of flack, and lost a lot of viewers, doing that last year.

Miscellany
And anyone know from where I adapted my post title?

Hilarious Internet-Age Creativity

2006-11-07T15:12:00.000-07:00

Game 6 of the 1986 World Series is as black an event for me as any Boston Red Sox fan. But that doesn't mean I can't find this video awesomely funny. It's over 8 minutes long, so it might take a while to load.

Sure, they got Buckner's big E wrong, but still, it's pretty damn impressive.

I'm regressing in my blogging

2006-11-02T12:09:00.000-07:00

My general malaise in life is going to manifest itself on this blog as TV talk nearly all the time. For some reason, that's all I really care about or think about these days, except for some political stuff which I'll address at the end of the post.

1. The Office - I'll try to satisfy my one fan's desires for recaps while not spoiling anything for another reader. Michael and Dwight are getting stupider, apparently, and their antics are getting a bit over the top this season. Jim, Pam and the supporting cast are where it's at for me. Creed's bits are awesome. Last week's Jim-Pam content at the end (is that vague enough for you, ACW?) was really nice. Looks like it's still there, despite Jim's new coworker.

2. Veronica Mars - I'm liking this very much. I look forward to it more every week. Last week's Elliot-Mya reunion (Enrico Colantoni and Laura San Giacomo from "Just Shoot Me") was cool.

3. Heroes - It's definitely the new Lost, giving creepy twists and turns each week, but only enough to make you angry that they didn't show more. So what's the deal with Ali Larter's character now? Is she dead, or only her bad half? Was she evil all along and not supposed to be among the protagonists? Is the boy's father the good guy? Interesting stuff.

4. Lost - The show may have lost (hehehehe) it's leading status of hip, trippy thriller, but it's still totally awesome. Though the opening of the season premiere ruled, the first two eps were kind of slow. But they've brought it over the past few weeks, and it looks to be getting even better. My only problem (big spoiler alert for those who haven't seen it) is this:

Why did you kill off Mr. Eko?!?!? His past and redemption made him a very sympathetic character, and a strong presence among the Losties, both spiritually and physically. That makes only one Tailie left: Rose's husband. But we already know all of his backstory (presumably). We know nothing of how Mr. Eko got to Australia, and why he was on the plane to the U.S. (or did I miss that part?). Is it any coincidence that he got arrested in Hawaii for a driving violation, and now his character's dead? Just like Cynthia Watros and Michelle Rodriguez last season? Sure, there have been some important plot points brought about because of the Tailies, but if you were just going to kill them off anyway, then why tell such a long story about who they were and how they got to the rest of the group? That just supports the critics of Season 2 who say that the show lost (hehehe) its focus and got mired in slow storytelling and tangents. Oh well, at least we got to see the smoke monster in action. I just wish it had been someone else getting thrown around.

5. Politics - I usually vote Democrat, but don't really identify myself as one. I'm a left-leaning, moderate independent. Democrats can disappoint (John Kerry), annoy (Nancy Pelosi), and frustrate (Hillary Clinton) me like any politician. And I can understand a lot of truly conservative (not mass-media Bush cheerleaders) viewpoints. Even pro-war viewpoints. But how can anyone in their right mind not see today's "Republicans" as just awful, horrible, cynical, opportunistic Super Douche Bags? I just read this editorial from Slate, and even though I already knew this stuff, I got really angry. Not only have these people been virtually controlling the government for 10 years, they've been making their evil method of politicking standard practice for longer than that. Can there ever be a turn around to how it's done now? Can the Grand Old Party ever return to its storied history when it actually did promote equality, responsibility, and fiscal conservatism? What scares me even more is the prospect of entering that bloody arena. I've been interested in entering politics, both state and federal, since high school. Now I don't dare unless I can hire a P.I. to investigate and clear me. But how much can Republicans find? Credit card transactions over 10 years old from accounts that have been closed? Websites visited on computers owned 7 years ago and sold to an anonymous family in another state? The fan letter I wrote in high school to the author of the Rush biography, in which I called the members of the band "divinely inspired"? I shudder to think what I and my family would be subjected to, even though I am secure in the conviction that I am 500 times more virtuous than a lot of people on Capitol Hill.

Happy Halloween!

2006-10-31T12:15:00.000-07:00

Long time no blog. I've been away from blogging for a couple reasons. Work's been kind of busy, life's been kind of boring. There were some things I was thinking of writing about this weekend, but I've forgotten them now. I haven't even been reading blogs that much, which is weird.

I'm also kind of glum lately, which stinks. My wife and I have to deal with a family issue that arose this weekend, which is unfortunate to say the least. That's got me down. Man, Halloween isn't even cheering me up that much. It's normally one of my favorite times of the year, but I guess there's not much to look forward to tonight. Our older son will trick or treat, but he'll mostly do that in another neighborhood with his biological father. Our neighborhood totally sucks for trick or treating, so that will be over in about 10 minutes. Our baby is too young to participate, so it will mostly just be a regular night tonight.

Well, that was a total downer of a post. Sorry about that. I hope everyone has a good holiday, and hopefully I'll have more (in quantity and quality) to write about soon. See you then.

My Son the Jackass

2006-10-18T12:50:00.000-06:00

Bear with me, I'm not maligning my son like you think. Just hear the story first:

My 6 year old son loves America's Funniest Home Videos. We DVR it every Sunday and try to watch some of it with him before he goes to bed. We didn't watch it until Monday evening this week, though, when my mother-in-law was visiting. (The extra audience is key to the events about to unfold, I'm sure.) AFV (who has forsaken the letter 'H' in its initials for some reason) has a recurring feature called "Head, Gut, or Groin" where an audience member is shown the beginning of a video clip. The clip is stopped and the audience member must guess whether the person on the video is going to get it in the head, gut, or crotch. Much hilarity ensues.

After the show, my son, having three people in the room to witness his performance, decided to act out the game. He started asking us "Head, gut, or groin?" After our answer, he proceeded to hit himself in the named location and double over on the floor. But then it was time for bed, so we told him to get ready. As he left the living room, though, he wanted to play one more round of "H,G, or G". Someone in the room (I can't remember who) said head. So my very smart son launched his head, at high-speed (although I remember it almost in slow motion), at the cushioned arm of our living room chair. Unfortunately, the cushioning on the chair is deceptive. His head knocked loudly into the wooden frame of the chair as we all gasped.

Luckily he was more shocked than hurt. He held his head and laughed about it while we suppressed our own laughter and lectured him on the importance of not imitating what he sees on TV. Suffice it to say, we will be vigilantly protecting him from all Jackass-related programming for quite some time.

And to all you Kristen Bell haters, I just finished reading all the episode recaps from Seasons 1 and 2 and don't see what's so annoying about her. I really want to watch the eps now. Hopefully I can rent them somewhere.*

*Not a hint to my wife to buy me the show on DVD. You need to be careful with her. She's very good at buying things I mention in passing. And while that's a great quality of hers, Veronica Mars is more of a watch once show for me than a "keep for the ages" show.

Are you shitting me?!?!

2006-10-13T09:41:00.000-06:00

Jim is moving on?!?! He's flirting with another woman?!?! Sure, she's cute, but what about Pam? I'm sure they're setting up some awkward situation where Pam drives to Stamford to declare her love for Jim, and finds him in the arms of his new coworker. Need a season 3 cliff hanger, I guess.

I'm talking about "The Office", of course, but I'll stop the TV talk at that. My cold has moved from sore throat and sinus pressure to an annoying, phlegmy cough that (along with other things) keeps my wife up at night. Thank God it's the weekend, although today's date is rather ominous. Maybe I should avoid any bad luck my ham and turkey sandwich may present and get one of those new Domino's Hot Pockets for lunch*. Don't want to tempt Mama Cass' fate!

What else is on my mind? Watched a flag football game last night, and I'm starting to think I want my sons to play football. Originally my dream was to have them play hockey, but let's face it, hockey's a third class sport (but still my favorite). Football is king, and I've become a huge fan of it over the past few years. Soccer is great, and it's cheap and easy for the kids to play, but football is where all the glory is. Maybe I'll have them play soccer in the spring and hockey in the winter to build their athleticism and coordination, but football in the fall to get them college scholarships. My wife will never go for it, though.

Be careful today, and have a great weekend!

* It's called "Pizza on the Go", and it's like a big calzone. I couldn't find it on Domino's site, so it must be some regional product test they're doing here.

Crap!

2006-10-10T12:02:00.000-06:00

I'm getting sick, or already am sick. I traveled over the weekend, and almost as soon as I got back home my throat felt sore. The soreness is going away, but I can feel a cough coming on, and I've got sinus pressure. I'm also starting to get that achy/tired feeling in my back. This sucks. The mornings are the worst, and this morning I was coughing up you know what. I don't want to gross my wife out too much, but sometimes it was dark brown. I can only attribute that to the brownies we ate last night. I hope it was the brownies.

So I've been thinking of joining an indoor soccer league, to get some exercise (since I stopped running in the mornings), to sate my restless competitive spirit, and hopefully make some friends. I guess there's no where for me to go with that.

TV - "Lost" last week ruled, especially the beginning; "Heroes" is getting freaky; I gave up on "Gilmore Girls", but will stick with "Veronica Mars" (who busted out the killer line "Boom goes the dynamite" last week); "Studio 60" is getting a bit too much for me, but "30 Rock" starts this week; and I'm looking forward to NBC's new gimmick game show "1 vs. 100", beginning this Friday.

Foley Blew, Hastert Knew!

2006-10-04T10:11:00.000-06:00

The title is a take on a refrain from the movie Turk 182. Pretty good movie. I'm referring, of course, to the recent Republican scandal in Congress. It seems that Mark Foley, a Congressman from Florida, has been sending explicit emails and Instant Messages to young male pages for a while now. (Of course, there's no suggestion that Foley gave any Congressional hummers, but I needed the rhyme.) Foley was busted recently, but there's evidence that Dennis Hastert, the Speaker of the House, was notified of the situation a while ago and did nothing to fix the problem. I particularly love this quote from the story:

From Representative Rodney Alexander, R-La: "Speaker Hastert is a good man," he said. "And I think he would personally break the neck of anybody he thought was trying to sexually abuse a young man or woman."

If that kind of rage-induced violence isn't the mark of a good man, what is? Wouldn't Jesus do the same?

Now while I'm no fan of most Republicans in Congress (I'm not a big fan of very many Democrats there, either, actually), I'm tickled pink at the "three-for" this scandal has offered:

1. A morally upright Republican, who has taken the lead in protecting youth from exploitation and internet predation, has been exposed as a hugely hypocritical pervert.

2. Hastert, a big Republican gas bag, is feeling the heat from his apparent cronyism designed to either a. help a friend avoid (much deserved) public disgrace and/or b. preserve the Republican majority in Congress and the party's false claim to a monopoly on morals and Christian values.

3. Foley, already forced to resign, has taken "full responsibility" for his actions. Which means identifying himself as an alcoholic the very next day, claiming to have been molested by a clergyman when he was a teen, and saying he was drunk at the time he wrote the perverse missives. But he's not making excuses!

Take 'em down! All false political idols.

I'm going to be away for the rest of the week, so I'm dumping unrelated stuff into this post. Like this funny video I received in a spam email - Martin Scorcese's Sesame Streets.

Yesterday was my wedding anniversary. We had celebrated beforehand, so last night we just drank wine and watched TV. Saw the new "Heroes", and while I'm still intrigued, it's getting bizarrely violent with an unseen villain's methods of killing his prey. Jury's still out.

"Studio 60", on the other hand, I'm really liking. I don't know if I have the stamina to watch it religiously, what with all the rapid-fire dialogue and oblique references to the past that apparently is very important to the present, but I enjoy the characters and there are some really good lines.

And of course tonight, season premiere of "Lost". Let's hope it's good. The Alternate Reality Game the Lost people did over the summer was fun, but ended with a schmaltzy whimper. Having been so focused on the origins of part of the show's mythology in that game, it may take me a while to care about the "here and now", so to speak, on the island.

That's about all I got. Talk to y'all later.

The Greatest Suck on Earth!

2006-09-27T23:58:00.000-06:00

I know that the circus is a pretty cheesy/sad thing once you're an adult and outgrow whatever cool it had when you were a kid, but since I'm a father we've made it a tradition to go every year. And it's the big one, Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey. Not some cheapo fly-by-night operation. Well, we went tonight and it was the lamest thing I have ever seen. Something seriously bad has happened to RBB&B. Whether it's cashflow problems or liability issues, I'm not sure; but let's compare this year's experience with the last three years:

Before:
Three rings
Cool Black Ringmaster
Bello, the awesome clown
Tiger show
Good, entertaining high wire act
High-flying trapeze artists

Now:
No rings, in fact a much smaller performance area
Fake "dad from the audience" living his circus dream
No Bello, just lame, unfunny clowns
No tigers. Just cats, doves, and dogs
No high wire act, unless you count the dove and cat on a 5-foot-high rope
No trapeze show, just fake "mom" swinging (and not in the good way)

About the fake mom and dad: The theme of the circus (since when do they have themes?) was Circus of Dreams. They brought one "lucky family" onto the floor to live their circus dream. Dad wanted to be Ringmaster, Mom wanted to be an aerial acrobat, sister wanted to be a "famous circus dancer" (an oxymoron if I've ever heard one), and the boy couldn't decide. So the whole night was about showing him things so he could decide what he wanted to do. In true suckjob fashion, the show ended with the boy finding his place in the circus by winning a video game and becoming King of the Circus. Way to carry through on that message of "use your imagination". Don't worry about actually imagining anything or choosing what your true heart's desire is. Just excel at video games and be important for that. Hella weak. And there was also the privilege of paying twelve fucking dollars for a snowcone in a collectible elephant cup. Utterly disgraceful!

The best things about the show were the Chinese acrobats (who performed the "video game")and the dirt bikes in the Globe of Death. The last time they did that globe was two years ago, and they crashed! Everything worked out well this time, though. They tempered that coolness, however, with a ridiculous strongman named Herkules who had less muscle definition than Liza Minelli. His big finale was catching a cannonball fired out of a "real cannon". You can't imagine how anticlimactic it was. The cannon lobbed the ball, slowly, about 15 feet, where he caught it more easily than when his "lifting partner" Sven tosses him the medicine ball.

You can tell how bitter I am, which is why I'm writing this tonight. I don't want the outrage to pass while I sleep. Heed my warning, all, and steer clear of the "Blue Tour" of the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus. It's not even worth it for the kids.

Ok, I'm probably cured

2006-09-22T14:08:00.000-06:00

Of my TV malaise, that is. I sat down to watch this week's recorded "Prison Break" last night, and totally forgot that "My Name Is Earl" and "The Office" were being recorded. I dove back into those and am very glad to have done so. Earl was very good, and The Office was awesome! I was anxious to see what they were going to do with the whole Jim and Pam thing, and so far I'm very pleased with the direction they've gone:

Two offices!
Pam not married!
Roy now a sympathetic character trying to win Pam back!

I've been so hooked on dramas for the last few years, maybe I should go back to comedies. It's too bad, though, that "How I Met Your Mother" conflicts with "Prison Break", my wife's (and mine to an extent) Monday addiction. I'll try to keep the new shows to a minimum, probably just "Studio 60" (if I like it) and NBC's other SNL-like show "30 Rock". Hopefully that will be funny, because Alec Baldwin is always money on Saturday Night Live, and Tina Fey is just hawt (in a smart and funny, yet also hawt, way). Tracy Morgan could ruin it, though. They should have used Tim Meadows. Oh yeah, "Heroes" looks interesting, too. Dammit! And when did NBC cancel "Medium"? That blows!

Ok, enough TV talk. Anyone live in a state that's having a heated Senate or House race this fall? My state's pretty boring for that kind of stuff, but at least we don't get the ridiculous attack ads here. There's just no point when you know how the state's going to go.

Have a good weekend everybody. Don't forget to root for the good guys this weekend (the ones from Columbus and Foxborough, in case you didn't know.)

Back in the saddle, so to speak

2006-09-21T11:06:00.000-06:00

But my horse couldn't be more lethargic. I don't know if it's the adjustment to the time zone, or recovering from the endless walking, but I'm not very enthusiastic about rejoining my regular life after our European trip. The weather that's welcomed us doesn't help, either. It's chilly and overcast. Neither of us is sleeping solidly through the night (the wife worse than me). And I just don't have much excitement for things. Not even the new TV season. There are some shows I'd like to watch, but the urgency I had last year is gone. The prospect of missing an episode, even the return of Lost, doesn't upset me much. I may even forsake most TV and actually read. Who knows. I'll probably get into the swing of things eventually, and get as addicted as usual. Let's see if you can help me get hooked:

1. If anyone saw the premieres of "Jericho", "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip", or "Men in Trees", let me know what you thought.

2. If there are any Gilmore Girls and/or Veronica Mars fans out there, is it worth it to start watching those shows at this point, seeing as they've already been on for several seasons?

3. Any other new shows you checked out that you recommend?

Otherwise, make sure you stop over at the other joint. I've put up some photos and a video of Day 1 of the trip. Check it out.

Bonjour Enfants!

2006-09-14T07:55:00.000-06:00

Here I am in Paris, with the wife, enjoying our last day. I'm posting from an internet cafe. Today was Monster Museum Day, with the Louvre, Picasso, Carnavalet, and Pompidou museums. Our legs and feet already hate us. (Shhh, don't tell them the walking's going to be even worse in London).

Hope you all are behaving in my absence, and jealously thinking of the adventures we are having.

A bientot, mes amis!

Oh yeah, I have a new blog

2006-09-07T15:07:00.000-06:00

Sorry for the lack of any writing lately. I've been busy, getting work done before my trip and just getting ready for the trip. I'm off to Europe this weekend, and really looking forward to it. I won't be able to play my quiz while over there (I may try when I get online to check email, but not everyday), so have fun battling it out in my absence.

As for my birthday, it was great! My wife gave me one of the best presents ever: ski jumping. I slid down a small freestyle ramp and jumped into a pool. It was awesomely fun, even though I kind of sucked at it. I've never done much acrobatic stuff, never really used a trampoline, so I didn't try any flips. It was enough just trying to stay upright consistently. I did some splits, and then my time was up. I highly recommend it to anyone, and I hope to go again and jump off a higher ramp.

So one topic I had hoped to write about after starting this blog was the American Conservative. I had the pleasure of hearing Tammy Bruce's radio show one afternoon, and it was interesting to say the least. Click on the link to find out more about this fascinating creature. Basically she's a (self-professed) pro-choice, lesbian Democrat who has become a raging war-monger conservative spewing inflammatory invective against Liberal Evil and critics of the War on Terror. Nothing new to those familiar with ridiculous pundits like Sean Hannity, Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh and their ilk. But she does distinguish herself in one way: She's openly critical of Bush, his administration, and has called for Condaleeza Rice to resign! She thinks they're actually being too soft on terrorists, evidenced by their Neville Chamberlain-esque appeasement of Hezbollah and Iran with the UN resolution sanctioned cease-fire. (Interestingly, she compared the Bush Admin to Nazi appeasers before Rumsfeld could do it to war critics). If she had her way, Tammy would let Israel bomb all of Lebanon, and probably the Muslim world, out of existence.

I could go on and on about how ridiculous and shrill Tammy sounds making these points, or about how absurd she is to say that Dick Cheney is a more respectable person than John Kerry because John Kerry only went to Vietnam to improve his political image, dishonorably shot a Viet Cong in the back while he was running away (carrying a loaded rocket launcher, in fact), and asked for purple hearts for wounds that merely required a band-aid. See Snopes' treatment of the facts here. (FYI, Cheney received medical deferments from service, and the only person he ever shot was his elderly friend, in the face and neck, on a bird hunting trip.) You can also google what in Ms. Bruce's past makes her whacko and pretty racist. But all of that is beside the point. My concern is: what if these aggressive neo-cons are right?

I suspect that very few reasonable people believe that the Bush Administration invaded Iraq to fight a legitimate terrorist threat or to altruistically depose a ruthless dictator and spread glorious freedom. I'm not talking about Iraq. I'm talking about the problem of Muslim extremists who want to attack the U.S. and other western nations. Is the only way to stop them by eradicating them? Is it too naive to believe it's possible to understand where the anger of extreme Islamists comes from and do something constructive to end that anger? Sure, we can emphasize the complexity of the issues, point to historical events and foreign policies that have created the situation in the Middle East. But is all that just academic? Is it too late to fix the problem by understanding its roots? Is our only option now to keep fighting until they're all dead? Normally I wouldn't entertain such barbaric, simplistic ideas. But what if the anger and hatred that's developed in the Middle East (and it appears from some of the rhetoric used by leaders there to be quite powerful hatred) cannot be assuaged? If that's the truth, then I am very scared and saddened by it.

I've gone on long enough, but thought I'd throw that out there for your consideration. Please leave some comments about what you think on the topic.

I'll try to do a post tomorrow before I leave on the trip, one that's a bit more upbeat.

You should all be very excited!

2006-09-01T10:05:00.000-06:00

Why? Because tomorrow, September 2, is a VERY special day! Someone is having a birthday tomorrow! It's someone you love. Someone you respect and admire. Someone you wish you knew better. Someone who has accomplished great things. Someone who is smoking hot! Someone with a great rack!

It's Salma Hayek!!! Who turns a steamy 40 years old tomorrow!

If she doesn't do it for you, then how about hunky Keanu Reeves, who turns a hot 42 tomorrow!

(Interesting connection, Salma's father is half Lebanese, and Keanu was born in Beirut, Lebanon!)

And to be topical, Jimmy Connors, the tennis legend and new coach for Andy Roddick, turns a dashing 54 tomorrow!

Probably no one you know turns 33 tomorrow, though. Oh well.

Shake and Bake

2006-08-28T12:47:00.000-06:00

I had the pleasure of seeing Talladega Nights this weekend, and it was funnier than I thought it was going to be. It had all the silly gags and goofy stuff I knew it would, but some of the dialogue was smarter than I expected. I guess we can thank Judd Apatow's influence for that. John C. Reilly (who according to IMDB was also in Days of Thunder) should definitely get more comic roles. He's just gold. I was pretty disappointed, though in Sacha Baron Cohen's performance as Jean Girard. I was hoping for so much more from his gay French Formula 1 driver. I also thought Amy Adams was way underused. Jane Lynch was great as Ricky's mom, and Gary Cole was good as his dad, but Sam Rockwell would have rocked the shit out of that role.

We also saw John Tucker Must Die, and man, did it blow! Not only was it the stupidest movie I've seen in a long time, but Jenny McCarthy was fully clothed and acted all mature and stuff. Not using her for T&A and/or comedy is just a waste. Maybe I'm just getting old, but when a movie implies that merely knowing who Cheap Trick and Elvis Costello are makes someone cool in a deep way, I want to lob grenades at the screen. The best thing about the movie was the Motion City Soundtrack song at the closing credits. But it was a night out, so that was good.

Watched a bit of the Emmy's too, and while I was happy to see 24 get the love, Gregory Itzin was seriously robbed. I don't care how good Alan Alda was in The West Wing, the newly devious President Logan deserved the trophy.

I guess that's all for now.

I have a confession to make

2006-08-25T10:04:00.000-06:00

It's time for me to confess and lay bare the vices that occupy my time during the day. The truth is I spend a lot of my day picking hairs out of my ears and nose. My wife plucks hairs out of my ears every now and then (she used to do it for her boss at an old job!) and her obsession with overly-long hairs has spread to me. Now I can't help but let my fingers drift up to my ears to feel for little hairs poking out. I let my fingernails grow longer so that I can pick them out more effectively, but when they get too long they become less useful (because they are less rigid and bend more easily, in case you were wondering). I often get thick hairs on the same corresponding spots in both ears. They feel like beard stubble when they first pop out, and I scrape my ear raw trying to get the little bastards. Sometimes I win, and sometimes I'm forced to give up and wait until I get home to remove the offending spike with tweezers.

The worst/best are the longer hairs deeper down in my ears. I can feel them with my finger tip when I brush away a little dried wax, but damn it to Hell, I come up just short when I reach in to pull the motherfucker out. So I end up spreading my ear cartilage, trying to wedge my thumb and ring finger in there. (The ring finger is thinner then the middle finger, but longer and stronger than the pinky. If that's not even better evidence of God's creative design than Kirk Cameron's banana, I don't know what is!) As you might guess, this relentless pursuit of a light-averse hair in the bowels of my outer ear can get quite uncomfortable. But I can't stop. And here's why: The rapture at finally getting a hold of the hair, starting the tug to make sure the grip is tight, feeling the tiny pin-prick of the follicle resisting the extraction, and then completing the sweet release out of the skin is quite the triumphant rush! Very little is as satisfying in my everyday life as battling a reluctant, hard-to-get ear hair and winning. Often, especially if it's a big one, I keep the hair on my fingertip and marvel at the formidableness of my fallen foe. It takes me longer than you would expect for me to finally say goodbye to the hair and brush it onto the floor. I am fascinated with my quarry.

As for nose hairs, they aren't nearly as enjoyable to pluck, and that's because they can really hurt. Often my eyes will tear up when I pull out a particularly recalcitrant one. The lighter, thinner hairs near the middle front of the nose are the worst for pain. The longer, darker ones on the inside, while impressive, don't captivate me. Nose hairs are just gross, and don't offer as much of a strategic challenge. Removing them is somewhat of a cosmetic necessity. Pulling ear hairs, on the other hand, is a sport done for the thrill of the hunt.

So what weird or gross personal grooming things do you do at work?

Oy vey, what a headache!

2006-08-24T16:39:00.000-06:00

Some anonymous commenter brought up the possibility of your names being searchable in the comments. So I checked it out and it appears that if you search within the Haloscan domain you can find comments left by people whose comment names you know. So what do we do now, S? Are we supposed to take on all new identities just so you can avoid some awkwardness with your coworker? No, because I've done some testing, and even if the comment pages get found, those pages don't refer to the blog (as long as I keep my url out of my Haloscan cookie). Even though I've put the column picture on the comment page, neither the blog title nor the url appear anywhere on the page. And before you ask, "But what about the ever so tell-tale Haloscan url?" I've already thought of that, and set my Haloscan username as different than my current or former blog alias. It would take some serious, devoted, and time-consuming work to find the blog that way, and I doubt that she's willing to make that kind of investment. Besides, she's supposed to not suspect that I have a new site at all, so I feel pretty good.

Okay, anything else I may not have thought of? Let me know in the comments, with your normal names.

Finally getting settled in

2006-08-24T11:13:00.000-06:00

There's actually several things I want to write about, but I thought finalizing the look and details of the place were more important. I'm quite pleased with the design. The banner is an actual reed that I photographed while camping last weekend (that's one of the stories I need to tell soon). I rested it on two camp chairs and put my car keys on it to make it bend. Then I Photshopped that bad boy out, found a cool Ionic capital column pic, et voila, my new kick-ass banner. I'm so damn proud of myself. Mad skillz, y'all.

Thanks for the inaugural comments you left, but now they're gone, in favor of Haloscan commenting. It hasn't updated the text on my comment links yet, but that should come soon.

Before I dive in and start writing, there are going to have to be some changes here to guard against being found by my coworker:

1. No mention of where I live or where I am traveling. I'm adopting Bliss' "hometown" method of vague-osity.

2. No mention of that "Last Weekday Offspring Posting" feature from the old place. I'll keep doing those posts over there, as well as some random posts now and then to throw her off. I'll probably also post pics of our upcoming Europe trip there, if I actually get around to it (remember my Hawai'i trip pics I never posted?).

3. New nicknames for my spouse and sons, and probably just a lot less mention of them altogether. I often tell stories in my office of what's going on with my family, and I don't want that to be searchable. That said, the little one's first birthday is this Saturday!!! Hooray!!!

4. No more iPod tracking. Yes, I'm that paranoid.

5. I'm going to be vague about the sports teams and bands I follow. That's probably overly cautious, but I'm sure you're all sick of hearing about them anyway.

6. I'm still deciding about linking to my daily trivia quiz here. I'm keeping it on the old blog, and will probably link it here, too, but with a different name. I don't think she's savvy enough to search for sites that link to my trivia page, especially since I don't think she's ever clicked that link on the old blog.

7. As I've requested, no one who is linked on my old site should link to me here. I think I'm going to rip off an idea from one of you and link to blogs using pictures, so she can't search for those names and find my links.

8. I may take this rebirthing opportunity to be a bit more, shall we say, raunchy in my writing and linking. I know that doesn't really do it for some of you, but maybe less filters will make my writing more enjoyable overall. Especially if you enjoy swearing and big boobies.

9. Last and most important, no work talk whatsoever. No complaining about coworkers, or assignments, no talk of how bored or lazy I am. Feel free to keep me in line if you catch me slipping.

So that's it. Welcome to the New Jan Brady, ummm, I mean The Slender Reed.

Patsy's Dead

2006-08-24T00:23:00.000-06:00

It was probably an ill-advised choice for a blog name. I think S. Reed is pretty good. Especially if read like Sean Connery reads "'S' Words".