Short Friday Post

Good Office last night, especially the end in the bar. Who saw THAT coming? Wonder what's going to happen next week. Look out, Jim!

And here's the second coolest stop-motion movie I've seen on the internet. (The first coolest was two guys fighting, and I can't remember where I saw it, but it was hella cool.)

TV Update

It's been really hard for me to watch all the shows I want since getting the gym membership. Good news is, we're getting some results from all the working out, but I don't like having to wait up to a week to watch an episode. So I'm going to devote this post to only two things: one short commentary and one topic I've never discussed here before.

1. Veronica Mars. Holy shit, was last night's ep good! They intertwined the two mysteries very well, and I loved the fact that both were complicated, serious cases instead of one Scooby Doo mystery of the week with the heavier, multi-episode arc in the background. Both were high-stakes and both were in the forefront. But the greatest thing about the episode was the end! I'm still shocked by it, and not sure how I feel about the development. I think two of my readers actually watch the show, and you've probably both seen the episode, but I'll refrain from talking about it for now in case you haven't seen it. Suffice to say, it was the biggest WOW moment of the season for me, even bigger than the fall finale!

2. I like cartoons. I'm not talking about The Simpsons, Family Guy, Adult Swim, etc. I'm talking kid channel cartoons. Having two young boys has exposed me to many an animated series, and I've become fans of several. I feel no shame for this because it's obvious that these shows aren't written only for kids. Watch SpongeBob or Fairly Odd Parents and you'll see that there are things in there that no kid could get. So yeah, I love SpongeBob, Odd Parents, Danny Phantom, Ben 10, Power Puff Girls, and Justice League (although I haven't seen JL Unlimited yet). I even have a little crush on Kim Possible. But one cartoon has become a true favorite, one that I watch whenever I can, and DVR old eps I've missed.

It's called Avatar: The Last Airbender and it's totally awesome. It's a very large scale, martial arts epic set in a mythical, Asian-influenced world. The world is comprised of 4 nations based on the 4 elements of nature: Air, Water, Earth, and Fire. Certain members of each nation can manipulate, or "bend", their nation's namesake element, meaning they can use it as a tool or weapon. There is an individual in the world who has mastered bending all of the elements, and whose job it is to maintain balance between the nations and the elements. This individual is called The Avatar, and is a spirit that is continuously recycled into a new body after the former one dies. The series starts with the Fire Nation (the bad guys) having waged war on the rest of the world for 100 years while the current incarnation of the Avatar is lost. He is discovered as a boy, frozen in the ice at the south pole. His name is Aang. He is the last surviving member of the Air Nation, 12 years old, and has to learn quickly how to master all the elements so he can stop the rampaging Fire Nation and save the world. He is accompanied by the two teen siblings who found him, members of the Water Tribe.

It's a fascinating series, with a very detailed and well-thought out backstory as well as a captivating plot going forward. It also has very well drawn and choreographed fight scenes that can get your adrenaline pumping like a Jet Li movie. I highly recommend it if you ever get the chance. It's on Nickelodeon, and is currently in reruns before season 3 starts. I presume that the creators plan on wrapping up the story in four seasons, one for each element, but I'm not sure. Whatever the plan, I hope that Nick keeps it on until they complete the story. It's so good, I care as much about its characters and the fate of their world as I do about the Lost survivors and Jack Bauer. For that, my wife likes to snicker at me. But check it out for yourself and you'll see.

Fuck You! Fuck You! Fuck You!

The geniuses behind Blogger are really fucking stupid! Thanks, morons, for making me upgrade to the new damn Blogger. You've fucked everything up!

Hodge Podge

First Item: Bruins 3 Oilers 0. On Chief Night, too! JuicyA is hating me today, I'm sure. Brad Bochenski has been on fire since the Bruins acquired him. He seems to have lit a spark under the asses of Patrice Bergeron and Marco Sturm, too. Now if only Savard, Murray and Axelsson pick it up, the Bruins MIGHT be able to make a playoff run. But that probably won't happen.

Second Item: I haven't been talking about TV much, so here's bit. "Heroes" is awesome. The return of "Lost" was great, with the bit of info about where the Others came from and how long they've been there. Not sure how I feel about Morris being nabbed to arm the nukes in "24". That's a bit too coincidental. I haven't seen this week's 2-hour ep, though, to see how it plays out. "The Office" returned to its buffoonery last week with Michael's wedding behavior again stretching the bounds of credulity, and not in a good/funny way. The funniest show of the week award (for last week) goes to "My Name is Earl". It seems like they wrote the show just to accommodate Jaime Pressly's pregnancy, but it was so chock-full of funny lines I had to pause it while I laughed so I didn't miss anything else.

Third Item: What the fuck is going on here?!?! Wow!

Fourth Item: The Police performance at the Grammys was pretty anticlimactic, but they're going on tour! Even if they come to my neck of the woods, though, I won't be paying hundreds of bucks to see them in a too-large venue. I'll wait to watch it on YouTube.

Awesome!

Best "Post Secret" submission in a while.



What's up, Doc?

It says WHAT??!?!

I know that the Bible is full of less-than pleasant things: plagues, wars, death, and even sex. That makes it a very compelling narrative, even disregarding the religious significance many people attach to it. That's why I love Slate's Blogging the Bible series, because I'm too lazy to read the actual Bible. But today I discovered something about the Bible that genuinely shocked me! It's in the Old Testament Book of Ezekiel, Chapter 23. During an extended metaphor likening Samaria and Jerusalem to exceedingly whorish sisters, God rips off these lines:

Men "fondled her virgin bosom and poured out their lust upon her"; "[men] whose members were like those of donkeys, and whose emission was like that of stallions."

Here's a less explicit translation:

8 Neither left she her whoredoms brought from Egypt: for in her youth they lay with her, and they bruised the breasts of her virginity, and poured their whoredom upon her.

20 For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses.

Wow! Ezekiel was one nasty mofo, who probably had some insecurity issues with both the size of his member and the volume of his splooge. Sure, it's metaphorical, but a metaphor is only as effective as the relative familiarity of what you're comparing to. To choose donkey dongs and super streams of horse jism as the ultimate tools of defiling women tells something about the author, in my book, and probably ancient Jewish society as a whole. Also, what does it say that the two women apparently liked it?

I never expected to read anything like THAT in the Bible.

2007 Super Bowl Commercial Awards

I know I'm late doing this, but I've been a bit busy the last few days. Let's get to 'em!

Best: I had a hard time choosing the BEST. There were several I liked, but not one that really rose above all others. Some of my favorites were the Blockbuster Mouse, The Bud Light Ax Murderer, the Snickers Mechanics' Kiss, the Garmin metal-meets-Power Rangers ad, and the Taco Bell Lions pronouncing "carne asada". (I love when the one lion says "Ricardo Montalban?!"). Because of the recent over-reaction to the Snickers ad by gay and lesbian groups, I'm tempted to give the award to it. But because the ending is too silly (they could have executed it better, and probably avoided all the controversy in the process), I'm giving it to the Bud Light Ax Murderer.

Best Overall Campaign: CareerBuilder.com, and their Survivor-like ads.

Most Improved: Emerald Nuts, who thankfully abandoned their incredibly stupid acronym campaign and introduced a mischievous Robert Goulet. Good stuff.

Worst: There were several stinkers: SalesGenie was a lame shortened 80s infomercial, the American Heart Association's snuff film was confounding, and the Jay-Z virtual football commercial really bugged me (because I hate Jay-Z). But the award goes to General Motors and their laid-off robot ad. How oblivious to the plight of thousands of laid-off American auto workers can you get, when you show a robot, partially responsible for the loss of so many jobs, trying to make ends meet in demeaning jobs and finally taking its own life by jumping off a bridge? I was shocked that anyone green-lit that ad. They could have made the perfectionism point in a much better way.